eHarmony Blog

eHarmony experts' take on dating, relationships and the science of love.


first date advice
June 28, 2016

How to Make Every Date Worthwhile

Most online daters have a general idea of the qualities they’re seeking in a boyfriend or girlfriend—smart, funny, athletic, etc. But couples therapist Peter Pearson says the most important factor is often overlooked: your date’s values. Pearson explains that while daters often place a lot of importance on physical attraction and common interests, shared values […]

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onlinedatinghelp
June 23, 2016

How to Make Your Body Language Say ‘I’m Hot’

If you’d like more responses to your dating profile, new research indicates you could boost your numbers considerably with one simple tweak: uncross your arms. A study published recently in Psychological and Cognitive Sciences found that people who have expansive body language—outstretched arms and legs, relaxed torsos—were rated as more attractive than those with more […]

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videopic
June 22, 2016

But if There are Millions of People on eHarmony, Why Do I Have 102 Matches?

Have you ever wondered how eHarmony makes compatible matches? Have you ever wondered why with millions of people using eHarmony, you have 195 (or 64 or 450) matches? We’ve put together a short video to help explain how we work the magic of compatibility: It’s not magic, of course. It’s science! Research and machine learning […]

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loneliness
June 16, 2016

Feeling Lonely? You’re Not Alone

If you’re single and searching for a partner, that doesn’t necessarily mean you’re lonely. In fact, it could mean the opposite. People who enjoy being on their own are less likely to settle for mediocre relationships, while those who fear solitude usually have lower standards. Maike Luhman, a psychologist at the University of Cologne in […]

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wants sex all the time
June 14, 2016

When Your Partner Wants Sex All the Time: What it Means

Not long ago, a female client came to see me for help with stress in her marriage. She and her husband had been married only a year, and they had been dating two years prior to that. One year into the marriage, he wanted sex all the time. My client came to see me because […]

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Beautiful woman driving and smiling
June 13, 2016

How Soon is Too Soon to Go Away with a Date?

The beginning of a relationship is one of the most exciting times, filled with bright expectations and new adventures. One of the things that makes this period especially fun is the prospect of vacationing with your new love interest. You, like many others, probably have a list of places you’d like to visit, and a […]

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friendships importance
June 13, 2016

The Importance of Friendship in a Couples’ World

Writer Briallen Hopper once had a close friend explain her priorities in precise order: her child, her husband, her work, her friends. “In her life, a kid thing would always trump a partner thing; a work thing would always trump a friend thing. This was the best way she knew of trying to impose some […]

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getting married nowadays
June 8, 2016

Should Every Couple Get Premarital Counseling?

In an ideal world, every couple who plans to get married would go to premarital counseling. In that world, seeing a counselor before marriage would be so expected that people would actually frown on couples who don’t do it. Largely because of the stigma that still exists around counseling and psychotherapy, many couples don’t go. Many men […]

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bad job affects your health and relationship
June 6, 2016

4 Ways a Bad Job is Bad for Your Relationship

During my training to become a psychologist, I did what every student hopefully does when they want to become a therapist: I got therapy of my own. One of the sayings my therapist used to routinely say was this gem: “Everything is related.” In other words, in one breath I could be talking about a […]

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battle of sexes
June 6, 2016

Let’s End The Bogus Battle of the Sexes

Shortly after my book, It’s Not You, was released, I was giving a reading in Brooklyn, NY, when a reader asked me why relationship books like mine are always written for women. “Because women buy the books,” I said. My editor and publicist, sitting in the front row, both nodded. This, I added, wasn’t necessarily […]

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