There are two questions that I get asked more often than just about any other…
#1: When a guy first meets or goes out with a great woman, how does he know whether he has a “chance” with her?
#2: If he feels like he does have a chance, what should he do next?
All of this uncertainty is caused by one simple fact: once a guy gets the vaguest whiff of a woman who might be interested in him, he usually starts doing almost everything WRONG. His mind starts to play tricks on him, he starts misinterpreting cues, and he starts jumping to conclusions.
Which is why I recommend that men do everything they can to escape the self-defeating doubt and guessing games when they think a woman might be interested…and start looking for the biggest sure sign that they TRULY have a “chance” with her.
After an hour (or so) of face-to-face conversation with a woman, ask yourself just one question: “Is she still behaving in a genuinely receptive, ‘friendly’ manner toward me?”
I know it sounds deceptively obvious. But guess what? Like most issues revolving around dating and the “courtship ritual,” it’s what most guys think they know that kills their chances of success.
You see, most guys still think that women exhibit certain physical behaviors…like tilting their heads to the side, smiling as they speak with you, or twirling their hair to show they’re “interested” in a guy. THINK AGAIN.
Problem is, these behaviors can be attributed to many other causes ranging from the meaningless to the ridiculous…and none of which have anything to do with your real chances of taking things to the next, more meaningful level.
Worse: these behaviors are often just “flirting”, meaning they can be easily faked by a woman who likes to “play games”, or even one who’s actually very nice and just wants to be polite.
So stop looking for these physical behaviors to determine your chances of long-term, more meaningful success with a woman.
Instead, focus on the bigger picture. Withhold all judgement and conclusions about “how things are going” until after an hour of uninterrupted conversation with a woman. Then (and only then) here’s what to watch for to determine if she’s behaving in a genuinely “friendly”, receptive way towards you:
1) Does she “take initiative” in the conversation? Also known as helping to keep the conversation going…versus letting you to do all the heavy lifting?
2) Does she interrupt you? ALWAYS a sure sign that she’s either “bored” with you, or too self-absorbed to be “girlfriend” material.
3) Does she maintain eye contact while YOU talk? Okay…this one is about a physical cue. If she’s constantly looking around the room or fiddling with her phone, it’s probably time to politely say goodnight.
4) Does she try to “dig deeper” during the conversation? Basically, if she’s asking insightful, appropriate questions and making meaningful comments about things that you’ve said, you’re golden.
Bottom line: No woman can “fake” this stuff. Doesn’t matter if she smiles and twirls her hair…if a woman doesn’t interact in the above MEANINGFUL ways, it’s safe to say you have almost no chance of taking things to the “next level” with her.
What’s next? What can a guy do to advance at that point?
The key is to avoid coming across as needy, overeager, or desperate while always keeping things moving smoothly and naturally toward the next step — and, like I always say, the very best way to accomplish this is by using humor with just the right amount of CONFIDENCE mixed in.
Just remember: all progress begins with that one signal: a woman behaving in a genuinely friendly way towards you (for more than just a “flirty” minute or two). So skip the mind games that most guys play to figure out if they have a chance with a great woman…and then take action to keep things moving forward.
After years of research, acclaimed “Double Your Dating” author David DeAngelo discovered the shockingly simple “magic key” to achieving life-changing results with women. David shares powerful tips and tools that ANY man can use to become the “real man” that every woman wants in his *FREE* DATING SECRETS newsletter. Subscribe here.