Want to go into your next relationship armed with the right tools so that it’s your forever relationship?
You and a man can have lots of shared interests and similar goals, but if you don’t connect with him where it counts – his heart – then nothing else matters. If you’ve ever felt that something was missing with a man – like you just couldn’t reach his heart, or that your conversations with him had somewhat of a superficial quality to them – then read on. There IS a way to connect with a man on a deeper, forever level, right from the start…
BE FULLY PRESENT WITH HIM
A man can’t connect with you if you’re anywhere other than with him. And this includes being in your head. If you’re on a first date and worried from the outset about whether there will be a second date, you’re missing out on key opportunities to connect with a man.
Your only job when you first meet him is to fully enjoy the experience and be right where you are. Savor your dinner, let yourself truly unwind on a walk, take in the sights all around you. When he sees that you can let go like that in the moment, he’ll sense that he’s with a woman whose only agenda is to enjoy his company. That takes enormous pressure off a man, making him feel comfortable enough to let you into his heart.
BE CURIOUS ABOUT HIM
You know what they say – everyone’s favorite subject is themselves. And a great way to instantly connect with a man is to show that you’re genuinely interested in what he’s all about.
So, if you feel the temptation to show a date what a great catch you are by giving him a rundown of all your accomplishments, volunteer efforts, great adventures, etc. – stop. Pace yourself. I’m not telling you not to tell a man these things, you absolutely can and should, just not all at once. There will be plenty of time for him to peel back the layers and find out what makes you so great when he asks you out again. And he will, if he feels he’s with a woman who truly wants to know more about him.
BE VULNERABLE FIRST
True intimacy and connection happen as a result of two people feeling safe enough to fully reveal themselves in front of the other. And someone has to start. So let it be you. This means you let him in on your true feelings – and even your fears. Say you have a big presentation coming up at work, and you’re really nervous. Rather than trying to pretend you’ve got it all under control, tell him what’s really going on for you. When you do, you’ll give him the message that you’re not perfect – and this is a great thing! He’ll feel relief that he’s with a real human who experiences real emotion, and he’ll feel safe enough to share HIS inner experiences with you.
Do you notice what all these connection “rules” have in common? They’re all about “being” rather than “doing.” The truth is, you don’t have to DO anything to connect with a man’s heart – you don’t need to cook for him, or plan a date, or try to get him to talk about his feelings. All you need to do…is BE! When you’re fully present with him, curious about him, and willing to show your true colors to him, you’re communicating that you’re comfortable with yourself. And that in turn makes him feel all the more comfortable – and connected – with you.
To learn more ways to make a lasting connection with a man through his heart, subscribe to Rori’s free e-newsletter. Rori will show you the common mistakes women make when trying to connect with a man, and teach you specific Tools you can do anywhere so that you’ll finally have the close relationship you’ve always wanted while still staying true to you.