Singles & Desirability study

The first-ever study by eharmony reveals that those who seek a committed relationship are considered most desirable.



Singles ranked attractiveness as the fourth most desirable trait behind honesty (54%), kindness (44%), sense of humor (34%), and intelligence (29%).


Qualities Most Desired in a Partner

Qualities Most Desired in a Partner


Honest 54%
Kind/Considerate 44%
Funny 34%
Attractive 34%
Smart 29%
Thoughtful 28%
Happy 24%
In Good Health 23%
Hardworking 23%
Confident 18%
Financially Well-Off 16%
Generous 16%
Outgoing 12%
Optimistic 12%
Artistic/Creative 8%
Organized/Efficient 8%
Carefree/Happy-Go-Lucky 7%
Serious 6%
Well-Traveled 4%
Quiet 4%
Assertive 4%


 What Men vs. Women Desire

Singles of both genders found that honesty and kindness are the most attractive qualities in a potential partner, while men were two times more likely to desire “attractiveness.”



70% of American singles are looking for a serious relationship.

70% of singles want a serious relationship

Men and LGBTQ+ people are more open to partners who want casual relationships than women and heterosexuals. Older people appear more casual than millennials.


Professions Desired in a Partner


The four most desired professions in a partner are all based around health, education and public protection – suggesting that people with “caring” jobs are more desirable overall.

Professions desired in a partner
Doctors, nurses, teachers, professors, veterinarians, firefighters and police officers are the most desired jobs by singles.



A strong interest in food is highly desirable in a partner – whether that’s going out for a meal (34%) or cooking and baking themselves (29%).


Domesticity is also key. 31% want someone who does handy-work, 26% want someone who enjoys a night in and 25% want someone who’s good with kids.

Eating out is the most desired activity according to singles.


Both younger and older millennials want someone who enjoys nights in (i.e. #Netflixandchill) instead of going out.

What millennials desire in a partner