Every January 1st, people all over the world pledge to get in shape. They get excited about making a change. They create a detailed plan for how they will reach their fitness goals within weeks or a few short months. They buy a gym membership and utilize it frequently at first. A concerted effort is made to reach these goals.
Unfortunately, it takes time to see the fruits of hard labor. After a month or two, the excitement wears off. The effort and pain involved in hard workouts start to burn them out. Suddenly, the usage of the gym pass declines or ceases entirely.
This whole cycle usually starts over again when summer approaches. Everyone wants to look amazing in their swim attire. Gym usage picks up for a few weeks and then declines once again. If we look deep down, we all know this because we have been there!
Innovation is the strategy used to change something in your life. When we use the strategy of innovation, we are aiming for a drastic change. We are looking to make a big change in a short time that will yield a jaw dropping turnaround. Most of us use the strategy of innovation when wanting to get in shape, start a business, or find love.
The problem is that this strategy rarely works. Sure, it’s flashy. At the end of the day, this type of change doesn’t last and often doesn’t help you reach your ideal goals. When using innovation to change, we almost always fall back into our old habits and routines once the initial enthusiasm fades away.
There is a better way to make a change and it’s called “Kaizen.” With the Kaizen approach to change you don’t make dramatic shifts in your daily routines. You don’t exert an incredible amount of effort for a few weeks only to burn out and quit. You decide what you want and take small, comfortable steps towards improvement. You create small routines that are easy to execute and fit naturally and simply into your life. Kaizen is a powerful strategy for finding love.
How you can you apply it to your search?
The key is to start small and make tiny changes in your daily routines.
• Open an online dating account with eHarmony
• Check your messages from potential matches 10 minutes a day (not 4 hours in the beginning!)
• Reach out to 1 potential match every other day
• Have one face-to-face meeting with a potential match every week or every other week
• Ask one friend, family member or coworker every month what they think you could do to be more attractive to your ideal match (either from a looks or behavior perspective)
• Have one friend, family member or co-worker critique your online profile
• Join eH+ for an extra layer of accountability
These are all examples of routines you can do right now to move your life in the direction of finding love.
The most important piece of advice is to create small routines that you can do UNTIL you find the right person for you. You aren’t expecting to find your soul mate tomorrow, but you can be confident that you are moving in the right direction.
The people who are the most successful in finding love take small, healthy risks. They accept that it will take time, patience, and endurance to find love. They are willing to put themselves out there.
They don’t just join eHarmony or eH+ just to sit on the sidelines. We want to empower you to take action. This is how you will find love. The best part is that when you are meeting people through eHarmony or eH+, you can be sure that they share your values and are compatible with you in many ways.
About Ashley and eH+:
eHarmony’s new service, eH+, gives you the benefit of a personal matchmaker who picks your matches and guides you to success. We’re taking the best of what eHarmony does and combining that with what personal matchmakers do best – person-to-person conversation, opportunities for feedback, and coaching to put your best foot forward.