Dating Don’t: What Can You Do for Me?

givingspiritA woman I know is struggling in her relationship. She finally sits down with her husband to talk about things, and what does he want to know? “What are you going to do for me to make things better?”

Never mind the fact that she runs around all day trying to keep the house clean for him, take care of his kids, make dinners,  and maintain a sense of balance for herself — he is all about what she can do for him. It didn’t even cross his mind to think, “How could I make this relationship better? What could I do for her?”

This makes me absolutely nuts. It is this selfish attitude that I see ruin relationships and friendships way too often.

An eHarmony employee who has helped many people on the service made a keen observation once. He said, “It’s so interesting how the people that come onto the site with the attitude, ‘What do I have to offer someone else,’ have much better results than those who are all about, ‘So, what is this person going to do for me?’”

It’s no surprise that those with a giving, unselfish nature do better on eHarmony and have better experiences in life. The more we can all be in a place of gratitude and giving the better. I am not talking about things or physical gifts — but a generous attitude.

Here are some questions we can all ask ourselves every day:

How can I help someone today?

Who in my life might need some assistance or support?

What can I do to make someone else’s life happier?

Have I been giving enough…or just taking from others?

One of my favorite people, Deepak Chopra, says to give a gift to every person you come into contact with — whether it’s a compliment, a small token of appreciation (like a flower or coffee) or a prayer.

So, what have you done for others today?

If this article gave you the confidence to find your match, try eharmony today!

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