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Long Distance



Deborah and Darren

Location: Longmont, CO
Married: September 1st, 2006

I was nearing the end of my subscription with eHarmony and still had no promising prospects for a relationship. I had set my preferences to have them match me with only people on the East Coast being that I was from NY. I felt that if there was any chance of me finding love on the internet then they'd have to live within driving distance.  With the end of my subscription nearing I decided to open up the preference of where my matches could come from. I decided to allow matches from all of the US to be sent to me. I was really skeptical about how a long distance relationship would even work and I even put that in my profile since I was so unsure about it. I figured I'd give it one last shot though.  Shortly after I made that change I was matched with a guy from Colorado. I remember being interested in the fact that he lived in CO. I lived there once before for 4 months and liked it there. I checked out his profile and knew right away that he was someone who would interest me. I would never normally be the first one to make contact and initiate the question process but there was something about his profile that drew me to him so I did. He was using an email account that he never normally checks and noticed he had gotten something from eHarmony. He hadn't checked the account in a while and figured he'd check it out. Before you knew it we were emailing pages and pages back to each other. We clicked instantly. Our sense of humor, our background, our families, our beliefs, we had so much in common it was amazing.


We were both pretty honest with not knowing how we felt about a long distance relationship. But after spending so much time getting to know each other we knew this wasn't something we could just pass off. Having a long distance relationship was probably one of the best things for us. We got to know each other in ways that you can't really get to know each other by going to the movies for date night. Our relationship was so much deeper because the only thing we had was communication. First it started with just looonnng emails, then an awkward first phone call, then we would webcam almost every night and talk for hours. I was shocked the first time I saw him on the webcam because his pictures from his profile looked nothing like him. He was sooo much better looking in person than in his photos. Because we were in a long distance relationship we never took the time that we did get to see each other for granted.  Fortunately, we were able to see each other at least twice a month. It helped us to grow our relationship because it allowed us to do special things for each other likes sending notes in the mail or writing a quick "just thinking about you" email. Things that sometimes you take for granted when you see the person every day. It caused us to learn how to express our love in our times together and in our times apart.


The long distance thing did get challenging at times. It's really hard when someone you love lives so far away and you can't just see them when you have a bad day. But it grew us in amazing ways. We got married 9 months after we met. I always said I would never meet and marry someone in such a short time. But when you are in a long distance relationship it seems to magnify your time together. Since you spend so much time talking it catapults the relationship to a deeper level.  We couldn't wait to be living in the same state. Even flying on an airplane together instead of leaving one another was such a nice thing. I wouldn't change a thing about our 9 months long distance. Being married now we've come to lean on our communication skills and never take for granted the time that we have together.  We became best friends before anything else and that is the basis for our marriage now.

Darren & Debbie




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