Close deadlines, conflicting coworkers, demanding managers, long hours - there are many opportunities for stress to creep into one’s work life. In fact, a Harris Poll on Attitudes in the American Workplace (2001) shows at least most Americans 82% feel at least a little stressed at work. And what’s more is that 42% of workers believe their job interferes with their personal relationships.

Work-life spillover has received some attention in the recent literature, showing that stressful work environments can create unhealthy personal consequences and stressful home lives can diminish work performance (Barnett, 1994; Ludlow & Alvarez-Salvat, 2001). With work and family impacting one another, families and individuals often struggle with finding a balance between the two.

To combat the often strained relationships between work and family life, Shelley Haddock and her colleagues interviewed couples who were successful in balancing work and family in order to identify best practices. For the family, successful couples often stated that they prioritized their family first, for example, by setting routines and rituals like having dinner together or spending time reading bedtime stories (Haddock, et al., 2001). They also thought about their jobs as a way to ensure the welfare of their families, instead of families as a way to ensure the welfare of their jobs. Another common practice was for couples to set boundaries at work, for example by limiting after-hour commitments. But these individuals also made sure to make their working hours productive in order to maintain their flexibility at work.

More recently, this same group of researchers also looked at work factors that helped couples achieve a healthy balance (Haddock, et al., 2007). They found that having some control over work hours and job tasks helped by allowing couples to schedule important family events when needed. In addition, having a supportive work environment, approachable supervisors, and helpful coworkers allowed for couples to communicate their needs and still get the demands of work accomplished.

So when you feel torn between the demands of work and home, take heart in knowing that you’re not alone, and then think about the findings of this research as you work to achieve a better balance.