Kiss and tell: what women and men want in a kiss
by Galen Buckwalter | October 4th, 2007Kissing is a near universal phenomenon occurring between sexual and/or romantic partners in over 90% of human cultures. While almost everyone kisses there is very little information around on why people kiss or what makes a kiss spectacular.
In an effort to at least get simple descriptive information on why people kiss and what makes some kisses an experience that makes one weak in the knees Susan Hughes, from Albright College in Pennsylvania, evaluated 1,041 college students. She asked then questions about their kissing preferences, styles, attitudes and behaviors. A wealth of information emerged. Here are a few of the most interesting findings.
- Men and women reported having kissed a similar number of people in their lives; 14 was the average number for both men and women
- About 50% of men would have sex without kissing their partner first; only 10% of women would do so.
- Men want to kiss someone based on their perception of facial attraction, women focus more on a man’s teeth in deciding if they would like to kiss him.
- Kissing seems to be more important before sex and much less so after.
- Overall, kissing is more important for women than for men in having a satisfying sexual experience.
- Overall men prefer wetter kisses with more tongue than do women.
- Both sexes preferred more tongue with long-term partners.
- Men are more than twice as likely to have sex with a bad kisser than are women.
- 59% of men and 66% of women have been put off by a potential partner’s kiss at some point in their romantic lives.
The authors conclude that women emphasize kissing as a means of evaluating a potential mate and to monitor the ongoing status of a relationship. Men employ kissing as a way to get sex and to affect conflict resolution. While the evolutionary role of kissing is certainly not settled, these results do bring attention to the fact that kissing plays a critical role both in developing and in maintaining romantic relationships.
Further Reading:
Hughes, S.M., Harrison, M.A., and Gallup, G.G. Jr. (2007) Sex differences in romantic kissing among college students: An evolutionary perspective. Evolutionary Psychology 2007. 5(3): 612-631
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September 11th, 2007 at 1:51 pm
when a woman stumbles onto a man that is a good kisser, she fully believes that kiss is a preview of the realationship to come, and of the man’s skills in the bedroom….
September 13th, 2007 at 9:09 pm
The longer I haven’t been kissed, the more important it becomes. I’ve had braces on for over 20 months, and no one wants to kiss me. I’m pretty despondent at this point, and don’t want to be with someone who makes my braces coming off as a condition of dating me. I really hate being a woman in a shallow world.
September 20th, 2007 at 2:06 am
Well, i find women that have braces to look very sexy and attractive. And I love to kiss. As long as i find the women attractive, i dont mind kissing a women with braces on. (edit) I love kissing and you having braces is not a problem for me.
October 10th, 2007 at 11:57 pm
Many men see kissing more as a prelude to more involved affection. However, in situations where longer term relationships prevail, kissing becomes a much more involved time for sharing and communication. It allows passion to develop in a more healthy way if the relationship is taken more slowly. It can be an incredible opportunity to gauge your partner’s feels as well as determining your partner’s probability in more involved love making. Finding compatibility in kissing between partners is not as common as many would think. When kissing flows smoothly and effortlessly, the partners can share an incredible opportunity for greater compatibilities. Kissing is much more underated by males than by females. So ladies, when you find that special kisser, keep him for awhile. He may surprise you!
October 11th, 2007 at 9:00 am
I find kissing can be fun and exciting. A good kisser – to me – is very important. It needs to be playful as well and passionate. A good make out session makes you feel good inside and out. I think a kiss on the lips for a greeting is a way to show affection as well.
October 11th, 2007 at 10:45 am
Beware of the “hard kisser”! They are either angry, domineering or just clueless! A soft, compliant and passionate kiss (wet or not) indicates interest, and/or kindness plus care and concern for the other person.
October 11th, 2007 at 11:03 am
I enjoyed reading all of the previous comments. I love to kiss. When I become attracted to someone special I like to Imagine where the first kiss will take place and how I hope it will make US both feel. I recently read a book about kissing, one of the comments said: during a kiss the heart can sometimes beat twice as fast as normal.(I liked that) Keep kissing..
October 11th, 2007 at 11:13 am
Here’s a question of all you male kissers out there. I’ve had an older boyfriend who says he can’t kiss me for more than a few seconds if we’re not going to have sex because it gives him an erection. I can take this as a compliment but we can’t always have sex as often as I want to kiss. Guys, is this really his way of saying he can’t get intimate?
October 11th, 2007 at 11:55 am
Kissing is sooooo important! It is the single act that can chart the course of an entire relationship, either ending it before it starts or fanning the flames of the fire forever.
October 11th, 2007 at 1:51 pm
To have a man start with small, tender kisses, then slowly build up the passion while kissing, is so extremely erotic. If men knew this little secret they would know how to drive women crazy — but instead they head right for passionate tongue kisses. I’m not ready for that right off the bat, usually, and it just makes me feel a little used rather than passionate.
October 11th, 2007 at 1:52 pm
In response to Elizabeth’s question, “Guys, is this really his way of saying he can’t get intimate?”, I respond as follows:
First off, NO, he is not saying he can’t get intimate, but kissing may simply be a means to an end for him. He’s likely all for intamacy, but only when it involves all four bases and is on his terms.
I can relate to his professed rationale as “erections” do happen, but I find that when you’ve got the connection with the right person, it’s typically mutual and can serve as great foreplay when circumstances aren’t ideal to complete the lap around the bases. Kissing rules and pays great dividends!
October 11th, 2007 at 4:36 pm
I like to kiss but I’ve never experienced anything as passionate as my most recent date. I’d never dreamed our second date would be so romantic. It was a beautiful night so we took a nice romantic stroll along the riverfront. We sat down on a bench, looked into each others eyes and then kissed passionately on the lips. I began nibbling and blowing in her ear, kissing her neck and cheek as she expressed her gratitude with deep moans. Then we would kiss letting our tongues dance together. This went on for almost three hours. As we went to leave she grabbed me in a very tight hug and kissed me with more intensity than she ever had before. I put my arms around her and she pulled me into her as tight as possible and we kissed like there was no tomorrow. When we finally parted, I was completely out of breath. It was the most memorable night of my life and I’ll never forget it.
October 11th, 2007 at 5:15 pm
Deborah and Scott . . . well “spoken.”
October 11th, 2007 at 5:54 pm
In response to Scott’s comment, I absolutely agree that a mutually pleasurable, exciting, prolonged or series of such kisses are an end in themselves. I recently experienced this with even without the introduction of small, tender kisses and I positively felt I knew this man would be a great lover for me and furthermore, if nothing else comes to pass I will remember those kisses for a long time. Or perhaps you just have to find the man attractive to begin with. Oh, that great kisser was named Scott!
October 11th, 2007 at 5:59 pm
A kiss shows that you do care about this friend. You kiss your mom&Dad and do you care about them Yes A kiss to me is one step closer to that person or one step back. It can go either way .So if you get the chance go for it . After all it is only a kiss!!!!!!
October 11th, 2007 at 6:37 pm
Kissing – or in fact anything you do with your mouth – is the most intimate thing you can do with a person. While often considered the “first step”, in my mind the continued desire to kiss your partner (and by kiss i mean truly kiss, deeply, and not in the peck on the lips manner) is a sign that the two people involved remain viscerally connected.
October 12th, 2007 at 12:54 am
Whether it’s a kiss, French kiss, Butterfly kiss or an Eskimo kiss just cherish it for as long as you possibly can!
October 12th, 2007 at 4:36 am
My tell … as it were … is if she can kiss. Can she give you her all …her body and soul … in a kiss? If she can, them I’m in. I can kiss you a hundred times a day … and feel all your emotions. I can …(expletive deleted) … maybe twice a day, and be left with that hollow feeling that I took you. Kiss me well, and take me on your whirlwind picture of life. Kiss me like a pig … bye-bye.
October 12th, 2007 at 6:52 am
I am sure this article will help a lot of love birds around the world to strengthen relationship.
October 12th, 2007 at 8:13 am
Ooh la la! I love kissing. Having braces in High school and early college forced me to kiss softly and to use my tongue deftly. When my dates go past the “really interested” phase, my first kisses are ALWAYS on the cheek–soft but firm, slightly moist, planted on the lower cheek or just at or below the jawbone–no pecks fellas. I’ll even kiss her hand sometimes. Be tender and passionate. She’ll think of nothing else but kissing YOU. It’s not just how you kiss though, but also how you hold her when you kiss. Your goal isn’t just to show her how good of a kisser you are, but to kiss her is such a way as to provoke a response that brings the kiss into a synergy–not just two people bringing their own kissing styles. If you think of EACH kiss as attempting to paint a masterpiece–according to the scenerio (all out passion or gentle strokes), you will almost always satisfy her and in the process–yourself. Any woman that kisses a man like that never forgets him–trust me! I love kissing. Maybe its the Scorpio in me.
October 12th, 2007 at 3:49 pm
Kissing is great but as a Christian I think it should be kept to a minimal before marriage. I do not believe in sex before marriage. Though kissing can be a WONDERFUL thing it is just one step away from ripping each others cloths off. Take caution when kissing too long if you want to have a lasting, guilt- free, Christian relationship. God will bless your endeavors:-)
October 12th, 2007 at 4:56 pm
The most memorable experience I ever had was with this incredible man who took my face in his hands, looked deeply into my eyes and began kissing my eyes very softly and then proceeded very slowly and softly to kiss all of my face, sweet gentle butterfly kisses, with him keeping his eyes open and watching me all the while. It was such a feeling of being loved and cherished, like I was the only person in his heart and his world. I have never had another man kiss me like that. Can you tell I absolutely loved it?!! Needless to say, it ended with a very passionate kiss in the end! WHEW!
October 12th, 2007 at 5:08 pm
Kissing is sexy!!!
October 12th, 2007 at 5:26 pm
Will someone please explain to me the allure of people who kiss each other’s top lip or bottom lip but not full on the mouth? Even the picture in the teaser for this article shows it that way. What’s the point of half a kiss? I’m not saying tongue is required, but least use both lips on both lips. Otherwise it’s just… weird.
October 12th, 2007 at 5:47 pm
I have been married for many years to a generous and giving lover; however, he always was and still remains a poor kisser. I let myself believe that we could “correct” this problem with time. I’ve tried talking about how I feel — I’ve tried talking with humour — and, I’ve tried to teach him how to be a better kisser. Nothing works!! I would much rather he be a good kisser than a skilled lover — especially as we grow older. If anyone has any advice, please bring it on!!
October 12th, 2007 at 6:15 pm
kissing is very necessary/important in a relationship-the soft hello/goodbye kisses when just starting a relationship all the way to the passionate long kisses that come naturally as the relationship progresses-it is a very intimate act when done w/meaning.
October 12th, 2007 at 6:31 pm
I have to sadly note that there is often a wide chasm between the motivations for kissing between men and women. Not always, but too often the woman ends up thinking a long deep kiss means he cares when it’s actually just a means to try to get the woman primed for sex.
October 12th, 2007 at 6:40 pm
I wrote this about kissing a while ago… Hope You all enjoy…
Kissing… oral intimacy. This, to me, is the most intimate act that two can share. Think about it for a moment… Two, so close… looking into one another’s eyes… into each other’s souls, leaving no room for outside distractions. Your entire range of vision is filled with only the other person’s face. The heat of the others body cannot be ignored. Breath mixing together, not just the air, the oxygen, but the timing of the breaths… one in, one out… re-breathing each other’s air. Oh! How much more intimate can two become? Noses cozy up beside each other, lips touch… together at first. Then, one leads, the other receives and the silent communication begins… Bottom lip, top lip, His, hers, both together again… then, the taste… the lick, first on the fullness of the lips then, moving to their center and then, inside, tasting each other for the first time… feeling the moan as it rises from Him, from her… passion increasing, tongues touch, retreat, touch again and begin to dance… Again, one leads, the other receives… back and forth, taking turns exploring teeth, tongue, the soft insides… Breathing increases together, eyes close, hearts beating faster and faster in perfect time with the others. Hands, arms, bodies, touching, extending the physical sensations beyond a simple kiss. Then one, looking first, to catch that glimpse of the others raw need. The pause… slowing down to again simply kiss, to once more gaze into each other’s eyes and savor the moment, thoroughly enjoying the mixture of taste, of fragrance, of life giving breath… the soul reaching touches. In reality, only seconds long, but the memory of this most intimate act lasting forever. Unquestionably, oral intimacy is the only way to get under another’s skin in such a permanent way. This type of intimacy is what I truly treasure and have shared with only one with such deepness and intensity to reach my soul.
October 12th, 2007 at 7:39 pm
there is only one man that puts butterflies in my stomach and I would settle for an evening on the couch with him any day! His kisses are wonderful!
October 12th, 2007 at 7:41 pm
His kisses are wonderful!
October 12th, 2007 at 7:57 pm
Sometimes no matter how good or bad a kisser one may be it ends up being more about how compatible the kissing preferences are between the two people. There are kisses that are intense and hard with full body contact that says,” let’s get it on! NOW!” and there are those soft long gentle kisses that end with sucking the lower lip that say,”mmm…. you’re yummy”. Either way, after being married for 11 very happy years I can safely say that the only thing I regret is knowing that I’m never going to experience another First Kiss. No act of physical intimacy beats the sensual ambivalence of a good first kiss.
October 12th, 2007 at 8:35 pm
I love the people I kiss. Kissing is really high on my list, nudging right up in competition with sex in priority. It is unavoidable. We really have no choice. It is not a way to lead into sex for me at least. Call me silly but it almost is sex. Even if I just get an ear.
October 12th, 2007 at 9:14 pm
I think it’s more about kissing compatibility than ’skill’ …
October 12th, 2007 at 9:28 pm
Isn’t life awsome.Hi in response to all these comment’s The best kiss Ive ever had. Is when there is love involved.That rocks!!!
October 12th, 2007 at 9:35 pm
I love kissing. There is nothing more wonderful than a man taking me in his arms and kissing me slowly.
I really hate when guys that seem like they are just ramming there tongue in and out of my mouth like I am the first girl they ever kissed. Or the males that open thier mouth to wide like they are trying to swallow my lips.
October 12th, 2007 at 10:05 pm
Kissing is IT! Everything begins there, or things go nowhere! And, it can’t be mastered. Tiger may be the best golfer that’s ever lived; but, there’s still plenty of room for improvement. PRACTICE, PRACTICE, PRACTICE. Really! Have fun with it. Pay attention. Respond to your partner.
October 12th, 2007 at 10:22 pm
I can tell you the one person I knew who was a great kisser was gently tender and warm inside and out. I have never fogotten the kiss.
October 14th, 2007 at 3:58 pm
That Rebecca is so darn right!
October 14th, 2007 at 4:23 pm
Steve, Ambrose, Dudecooks, Fizzywater, Scott, Donald and Paul,
Thank you, gentlemen, for your comments. How delightful (and telling….) that out of 37 comments so far, only 7 came from men!
I have to agree with each of you who have spoken to the incredibly exciting and tremendously memorable kisses that leave you breathless… you never forget!! It is the one good thing I am enjoying as an older woman beginning to date again – a first kiss. Kissing is a truth teller for me about what is coming next…physically, emotionally, sexually. If he is gentle but firm, slightly verbal and holds me steady while he begins his seduction and he is considerate even when assertive and turning it up a notch…he is never forgotten. Great kissers are rare and unique and…MEN…LISTEN!…we love them.
October 16th, 2007 at 11:59 pm
Mmmmm, kissing. Here’s how I would like to be wooed.
If a man whose company I thoroughly enjoy is clever, he will gage my pace accurately. Reading me correctly, this intuitive gem will not kiss me for the first time until I’m at least 3 dates past really really wanting him to. There has been plenty of two-way leaning closer, flirty-eyes stuff so I am confident he is attracted. But timing is all. Because I will remember this moment for the rest of my life. Then, it’s one, slow, soft, warm and wonderful kiss and that’s that until the next time we see each other.
He always leaves me desperate for more, instead of worried that he thinks my consent to kiss is consent for more. The next few times we’re together, I wonder if he will kiss me, and wait, and hope, and of course, he finally does, and it’s just too yummy, but then he’s saying good night, call you tomorrow and he’s gone again. This is a man who understands about seducing my mind and heart, and then my body. Each of the other steps to the bedroom is long and drawn-out and sumptuous like this.
Later, when we’re comfortable lovers, he still kisses this way, still employs a kiss for its own sake, not a prelude to more. And he has a repertoire of kisses: the tender one on top of my head, nibbling my bottom lip, laying his nose beside mine and breathing in my essence (the Inuit “kiss” that is mistaken for nose-rubbing) to carry him until we see each other again, the cupped-face study-and-explore tenderness, a tug on my earlobe, and also a creative variety of passionate, urgent ways to tell me I’m desireable.
A good kiss in the kitchen is worth a dozen rolls in the bedroom! Whew! Who gets this? eH, please match us!
October 18th, 2007 at 5:47 pm
I think kissing if done right is sooooo sexy. I love to be kissed on the neck and face gradually leading to the mouth. Small soft tender kisses with nibbles in between really turn me on. When you finally get to my mouth I’m on fire. There is definitely alot to be said for a man who takes his time. The pay off is unbelievable
October 20th, 2007 at 6:53 am
In having only kissed two women in my life, I find it hard to believe that alot of the women thinks guys just want to get it on when they kiss them. The lady I was with the longest didnt really like kissing at all, while the other would love being kissed. I thought of nothing better to do then just to lay in each others arms and kiss. Just let things happen at there own pace. Just enjoy the moment.
October 20th, 2007 at 9:01 am
I love what Chris says about “still kissing that way” after being lovers…I have found unfortunately, that more often that not, once it is no longer a means to an end, the kissing “that way” stops…except in bed or on the way there…
I agree that kissing for the sake of kissing is an artform…but I also think you can learn to kiss well together…if you are paying attention and following your partner’s lead…most people kiss the way they want to be kissed…
October 20th, 2007 at 10:38 pm
I love kissing. Though I agree with Ambrose. The approach is important. I love when a man holds my face, hands or strokes my hair while kissing. It makes the kissing more passionate.
October 20th, 2007 at 11:27 pm
Kisses in a relationship is very important. It tells a lot about the person. The way they kiss and how often they give kisses. To me kisses are very intimate and I only give them to people I care for. When you kiss a woman, it sets a stage on so many different levels. Kissing can mean just a simple form of affection or that you love that person deeply. One thing for sure in a kiss..in a truly loving relationship, there must be passion in a kiss. You can tell when a kiss is caring, romantic, loving or such passion that it leads to something more. As a male, it is very important to understand that a kiss does not always have to lead to sex. Never under estimate the value of a kiss and how it is given.
October 21st, 2007 at 9:11 pm
I have a question more than a comment…
I have dated a lady for over 8 years…she proclaimed to be frigid some years ago after all other forms of inmtimacy stopped–the relationship has regressed to a platonic state…we are now like brother and sister.
It’s been probably three years since I have been allowed to lip kiss her, she turns her head quickly if I try–the closest I get is a cheek kiss, she never kisses back…now to the question…if a woman is truely frigid are all forms of affection such as kissing out??????????????????????
October 22nd, 2007 at 10:12 am
in my very recent experience, kissing is just as important to me as my significant other. we are still in the early stages of our relationship and kissing allow us to express emotions that we are not yet ready to verbalize. it is something that we both throughly enjoy and plan to contiue engaging in. the longer we are togther the more we seem to be kissing.
October 31st, 2007 at 9:44 pm
In response to Jay, I wanna say, it’s been 8 yrs. did u guys ever dicuss why your girl has such ‘hang-ups’ any medical or phiological reasons?? Is there more going on here under the surface?? sounds strange to me, since I personally enjoy kissing, (I think it is very intimate) but, there are some people who don’t like to kiss or even being kissed. Have you tried talking about it. I don’t think being a little frigid would have anything to do with it, Is she an affectionate, passionate type of person other wise?? JUST ASK HER, TALK ABOUT IT.
November 1st, 2007 at 1:54 am
I am very limited in my experience, but I’d like to share my experiences with kissing. I’ve had sloppy, stabbing tongues down my throat and really good kisses. I had kissed a lot of guys but this guy did it right! He took me in his arms and started kissing my slowly and deeply (no tongue yet) and then he took one hand and caressed my face. He kept kissing me and making it deeper and deeper. I heard moaning and didn’t realize it was me until about 5 minutes later. I got so caught up in that kiss that I didn’t even remember that there were other people around me. That kiss, THAT KISS sent me reeling! If I had someone that could kiss like that, I definitely wouldn’t let him go. I could keep that up for hours at a time.
November 1st, 2007 at 8:30 am
I think, for me, Robyn summed it up the best.
To me a kiss is where our Souls touch with our eye’s being the windows. It is the way we can express the passion within our soul.
There is nothing more wonderful than to hold that special someone close, gaze into their eyes, touch their face and kiss their lips.
I’m thinking of someone now.
Nothing else comes close.
November 1st, 2007 at 10:26 am
A kiss can be so much, especially early in a relationship, I have been kissed in so many diffrent ways some conect lips and have their tounges flick in & out at which doesnt do it for me (ther is a time and place for all kisses) but have always known what kind of kiss is the real thing to me. The slow soft warm gentle kiss where the noses touch and the lips make full contact, short contact that leads to longer contact with the tounge slowly making its way out to explore each other, keeping the lips equal not to over take the other persons lips, that leads up to a more passionet kiss where our mouths are equally open and can feel the suction of each person keeping the tounge in each others mouth to unify us, secures our mind and lets the other know that we are one person linked together and desire each other.
Now for those who don’t understand the kissing of someones eye, forehead, nose, cheek, ear, fingers, hands, neck or just ONE LIP is foreplay or an act to stimulate and set the frame of mind, I find it relaxing and a way to show compassion toward the person i’m kissing, that leads up to a more enjoyable and memorable kiss between two people.
November 1st, 2007 at 12:37 pm
In response to CHRIS from 10/16/07 — Chris, I could NOT have said that better…! That is EXACTLY the way I like, love, and NEED things to be – otherwise I feel used and things go nowhere… Lovemaking is an amazing sharing that happens between two people who connect – through mutual like, attraction, whatever — not just “getting laid”, having sex based on physical lust (or “scheming” on the part of the guy!)
One of the WORST dates I’ve been on was a first date where the guy invented all this intimacy between us that wasn’t there – it hadn’t had time to develop yet! He wanted to kiss and touch me very sensually after we chatted for 2 hours at a coffeehouse, but the only way it made me feel was like he wanted to “get laid”, not like he wanted to get to know me… Ugh! ANYHOW, thanks to Chris for saying it perfectly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
November 1st, 2007 at 12:41 pm
I need to wade in on kissing…I’ve kissed many, some as a prelude to further intimacy, many as an expression of intimacy to come. All my sensory systems are activated and I can remember kisses of many years past, the touch, the taste, the scent of her closeness. Almost nothing is more intimate between a man and woman. I can’t wait for the next one.
November 1st, 2007 at 12:56 pm
A kiss is NOT just a kiss. There can be a lot of passion without the sex! There is so much expression and non-verbal communication. A great kisser is never forgotten! Even if there has been a dry spell, it is like riding a bicycle– for crying out loud! You don’t forget how to be tender and let your lips to the “talking” When I was married, my husband’s kisses were so mechanical, after 25 years. Keep the passion alive. (Watch out for that, men). It was all about the sex and a turn off to me if the heart is not in it. It is empty, shallow and degrading feeling. Cher’s Shupe Shupe song, remember, Does He Love Me? It’s in his KISS.” Men that are unselfish and not in it just for themselves, but for the pleasure of both of you, now that is a kind and considerate, companion, lover, etc. The Pointer Sisters, and Conway Twitty sang that song, Slow Hand, Listen to it and get a clue men, and women. No bam, bam, thank you man, mamm! Just take it a moment at a time and enjoy each other. Holy COW!!
November 1st, 2007 at 1:32 pm
After 17 years of marriage I SO miss the thrill of new kisses… the chemistry, the anticipation, the exploration, the passion… *SIGH*
November 1st, 2007 at 1:33 pm
In response to Patty’s of Nov. 1, 2007, I MUST agree with you. Kissing a man makes me really warm inside and it’s just sometimes so intense that you feel as if you are taken to another place! There is nothing more intense that that first kiss, leading to…
WOW!
November 1st, 2007 at 1:41 pm
At 50 I have the good fortune of having a 36 year old lover. I thought I was a good kisser until I met her. She taught me the art of kissing. Now I value good kissing a lot more than I used to and I enjoy it a whole lot more, too. I said to her the other day, “I like kissing a lot better than did before we met.”
She said, ” you were a good kisser when I met you, but you’re a great kisser now.” So ladies, if you make the investment in training you will reap the benefits in kissing!
Jay
November 1st, 2007 at 1:54 pm
It started very sircumspect and didn’t even show
Not that she would have it different, ’twas better no one know
And so with heart’s cresendo, almost painful with its beat
She reached and pulled him closer so that their lips could meet
Has had looked transparent, as brown had mirrored blue
One feels completely naked when one sees inside of you
And so with soft complient shrug she played the weaker part
And with a warm tongued greeting she opened up her heart
Ands every breath they took from there shared sommon breath of life
She never dreamed that midnight she’d want to be his wife
She only dreamed that lover’s dream that someone matches you
And life’s purpose indefinable has magically come true
What was that telltale signal of all that roiled within?
No, not warm perspiration, but chill bumps on her skin
So feeling quite delicious in a life almost complete
Sense wrapped up all her wishes and turned the chill to heat.
November 1st, 2007 at 1:55 pm
oops! “Has” shouls be “he”.
November 1st, 2007 at 1:56 pm
There you have it, I’m undone, by memory of that kiss!
November 1st, 2007 at 3:13 pm
2 things never lie a womans eyes and her kiss. If you’re in a relationship and that first kiss of the day is as mind blowing as the first time you kissed then your relationship still going strong and if your first kiss can curl your toes then that’s the girl for you.
November 1st, 2007 at 3:36 pm
I had the incredible fortune of reconnecting with my high school sweetheart 30 years after we broke up. We went out for years and he was my first love. Well… first… everything! He was and is the love of my life, and I, his. He was a wonderful kisser then. Now it is even more incredible. The first time he kissed me this time around was undescribable. The feelings, the passion, the love that was exchanged completely rocked both of our worlds. I have been back with him for a year now and the kissing ( don’t know how) has just gotten even better. I dream about kissing him, tasting his mouth, feeling the softness of his lips, his tongue constantly and cant wait until the next time. The connection is something I can’t describe on paper, but it is the most beautiful, meaningful, fabulous thing I have ever had the incredible fortune of having. God has been soo good to me. The sex is pretty fantastic too, however, the kissing is gift and I am so lucky.
November 1st, 2007 at 6:15 pm
Good oral hygene is a plus, rotten teeth, stench from decay of food and tobacco breath take the thrill out of any kissing excitement. Passionate kissing, before sex makes the difference between a dull romp and a rememberable one. Bad kissers are dead in bed,period.
November 1st, 2007 at 7:22 pm
I had the most incredible kiss with a someone special a few years ago,it is the kisses with passion we all remember or long for in our lives,i was blessed to experiience it with someone who will remain in my heart forever
November 1st, 2007 at 7:25 pm
I met a woman via an online dating site. We emailed and talked on the phone for about two weeks before our first date. We had developed a very strong connection before we even met. When I finally saw her, and she saw me, the very first thing we did was kiss. I have never kissed someone upon first meeting them, but at that point, we already knew each other’s souls. Unfortunately, the relationship ended for a variety of reasons, but I will never forget that night–the best first kiss of my life.
November 1st, 2007 at 7:58 pm
The best kiss I ever had was about two years ago in Hawaii no less!!! I was on a business trip and gave into a long anticipated make out session with a then co-worker. The ice breaker was on the elevator to his room. It was sweet and soft. We went to the balcony and watch the waves come in and the moon over the lagoon right under his hotel room. We talked about what we were possibly getting into and the next thing I knew he scooped me up in his arms and leaned me over the balcony. I could feel the weight of my hair dangling over the edge. It was seemingly dangerous and forbidden (given our working status)!!! When we parted I remember him whispering “wow”. He took the words right out of my mouth! The greatest thing about that kiss is it lead us to being the best of friends. We stopped kissing but I’ll never forget that night!
November 1st, 2007 at 8:25 pm
I recently had an intimate moment with a guy, and i must say he is the worst kisser ever coz he actually bites and its soo painful especially on my lips .How do you tell someone or how do you teach someone how to kiss without bruising their ego?
November 1st, 2007 at 10:51 pm
Thank you, gentlemen, for all your comments. I agree with everything you said. Kisses are not just ways to show affection; they are romantic. And most women I know love romance! A good kiss is worth more than chocolates and flowers any day. My most memorable kisses were warm, soft build-ups to better things (and more passionate kisses) to come. One thing I would like to repeat, especially to the men out there: Variety! Don’t always kiss a woman the same way. It gets old after a while if you always know what to expect.
November 1st, 2007 at 11:16 pm
Kissing is an art form that requires continual practice, spontaneity and originality. It is also the way into a woman’s heart sometimes quickly, and sometimes slowly with multiple kisses patiently turning the key.
November 1st, 2007 at 11:36 pm
After reading all of the comments from people here, I must admit these have allowed me an opportunity to release alot of positive emotions and memories from a colleague and girlfriend which the 21st of November will be a 4 year anniversary when we broke up. It all began working for a new employer, driving a school bus over these new routes which would be mine once school started. I’ll go by the initials of JM to respect her privacy. It just so happened I had the wonderful pleasure of having her train me for 2 weeks and getting to know her as well. I’m talking about an absolute knockout woman, inside and out, who worked out, had excellent curves all over and she’d stop guys in their tracks if they took a look at her. She was also 4 years older than me (I was 35 @ the time). I was sitting across from her in the bus seats where the students would sit and she asked me a personal question. I wasn’t too sure what I’m getting into @ the time but I allowed her to ask me. I gave her an honest answer and asked her if she was jealous. She was jealous. I’m sure women don’t like to do certain things in the morning before going out to work or play- So I’ll leave that for y’all to answer amongst yourselves. I asked her out for dinner about a week later and it took alot out of me becuase I’m sure she had plenty of men waiting for an oportunity to show her a good time, at least I once thought. She said yes, and really threw me for a loop. From that point on, we went on walks together @ a park 5 minutes from the yard- held in-depth conversations- had same childhoods growing up together- and shared alot in common. Back in September 2003- JM and I really had something going- getting deeper into each other. I’ve met her 3 kids- wonderful gifts from God, and they started accepting me for I am. Anyway, back @ the park, on a playground, I was getting warm so I took off my coat and I asked her if I could take off my shirt and she said okay. So I soaked up some warm rays of the sun, while cooling off, I’ve said to her ‘I wonder what it’ll be like kissing you’. The strangest thing happened because she felt the same way I did and on the same page. So anyway, we walked around some more and we found a nice secluded spot on a bridge over a creek in Dellwood Park. I can’t remember for the life of me what we were talking about then, but all I knew then is I was looking into her windows to her soul, putting my hands on her face with such tenderness, and I’m really trembling on the inside and on the keyboard:-) !!! I delivered 2 healthy, soft, and passionate kisses which really knocked and shook us to the very core. I was really light-headed and winded. So up we went from there to go to work- I was surprised I could still drive the bus w/ her taste on my lips!!!! She was wet in primetime from the afternoon’s events but this was only a warm-up. We started doing things together more often, playing w/ her kids, helping them w/ their homework, going to church together, hanging out w/ her friends, taking naps together @ her home, and working to go even deeper into each other’s minds and hearts. One night in her house- I was feeling really weird, starting to reflect on everything which was happening to our friendship and could it be it’s blossoming into something more. I was really struggling w/ this, trying to keep my composure and emotions in check, but myself to starting falling in love w/ her- I just knew something was happening but I couldn’t figure it out what it was. I knew my heart was flying like it had wings and when we had an disagreement- it would be hurting. We went outside while her kids we’re inside doing their homework and whatever else while we talked. I explained to her what’s troubling me and she told me something that I’d never forget. She said, “Rob, I really like you alot, and I’ve fallen in love w/ you.” I’ve completely lost it, my kisses to her were just getting more and more intense, including the french kisses- those kisses were so long, consider them never-ending. I’m fighting so hard to keep myself in line and slowly losing my grip, choking on my tears literally because I now know what love is- I’ve never experienced ‘unconditional love’ from anyone in my entire life until I’ve met JM. She loved me for who I am and not what- all of my flaws- ‘who you see is who you get’ and nothing more. We’ve also very intimate w/ each other several times during the week in b/w midday and PM routes which allowed us an hour. We also were invited to a friends wedding celebration. We danced in each other’s arms and kissing passionately w/ each other. We left early, and went back to her place- we got even more intimate and didn’t quit until about 330AM the next morning- and we’re dead exhausted when we went to church that Sunday!!! We always loved each other’s company and we didn’t always have the time to be intimate w/ her kids around. One night in November probably the 8th, we had a major disagreement- once the intuition (gut feeling) kicks in, that’s the end of it. She asked me how I felt about her and the relationship. I really loved her and I wasn’t too sure how it pan out. Regarding to provide for her, and the 3 children- even though she never asked me to. She also envisioned having a child of my own but I wasn’t too sure she’d like to start over. Lastly, this guy who works w/ us, and has broken up w/ her 2 times before, wouldn’t leave her alone- throughout our relationship- leaving messages on the answering machine and ruined a beautiful quiet time for the both of us and took the mood out w/ it. So all of this came to a head and I wanted to end it. These were big enough issues back then which I didn’t know how to respond to them. We’re crying @ this point, she, I and her daughter, and the youngest son. So we went to sleep crying our eyes out. So much emotion flowing @ this point- you couldn’t tell from beginning to end. She calls me up the next night as I’m driving home and I’m hurting big time- she blocked her phone number from my cell phone and we talked for a couple of minutes. I asked her if felt comfortable for me to come by and she was okay w/ that. I basically said I wanted to make it happen and to last- and what her position was on this. She wanted to make it happen also and we’re all crying in each other’s arms: her, her daughter, the youngest son, and myself. Things, were definitely different until November 21st- after my 36th b-day. She broke up w/ me and said “I’ve prayed about our relationship and I want to break up w/ you. I still have warm feelings about you, and I hope you’re okay w/ this.” To say the least, I knew this was coming but when is another issue in itself. To this day, nearly 4 years later, I still have feelings for her, like the flame never went out- she was my flame and I was hers, and I’m hoping and giving hope to all of those who’ve lost the spark to the love of their lives, it can be rekindled and all you have to do is make the contact and find out where your partner stands. People and circumstances change. Hey, I should be that guy in the movie “A 40 year old Virgin” What do y’all think about that??? I don’t believe in sex before marriage like the Bible commands us to do, so I’m saving myself for the love of my life until I say “I do” and 2 bodies are united into 1 like He says in His Word.
November 6th, 2007 at 2:52 pm
Recently, I got involved with someone who was an amazing kisser. We had known each other for a year and a half, but all of a sudden we both realized there was an attraction between us. We started flirting, and talking and chatting online. Eventually we made a date…and when his lips met mine for the first time, I was overwhelmed. His hands were exploring my arms, my back, my face, my hair…his lips were soft and full and gentle. The kiss built and built until I thought I would explode. We kissed this way for about an hour. It was an amazing experience. We kissed tenderly at first, but they became more and more demanding. When we composed ourselves, he sat there just looking into my eyes, touching my face, tracing my lips with his finger, then my nose, then my eyebrows. He placed soft gentle kisses all over my face and my neck and ears. He told me it was an amazing experience that he would never forget, and he had never known a woman who enjoyed kissing him so much. We dated for a while and everything about our relationship was very special to me. He enhanced my sensuality a great deal and I am more aware of my needs now. Unfortunately, we don’t see each other anymore, but I will never forget him, or the way he kissed me. His is the kiss against which all others will be measured!
November 9th, 2007 at 10:38 am
Hi – I am married and recently met up a few times with an ex. We have had dinner a few times. The last time he kissed me full on the mouth as we said goodbye – for me it was mind blowing but can any of you guys tell me if this means he wants more than just friendship or can this just be a friendly kiss albeit quite intimate too?? I’m confused and don’t want to ruin our friendship.
November 10th, 2007 at 6:24 pm
Kissing – Is that WONDERFUL feeling of goose bumps
before the initail soft and romantic first kiss your thinking about and then it happens. To me, it is the best feeling of that second kiss after the first. Making out is the best.
December 17th, 2007 at 11:45 pm
I remember my first kiss!.. it was so sweet, kinda and made me feel great inside! He was the most gentelman u could ever find…. Elijah*.. and i no what a bad kisser is like i was dating this guy called Ethan.. like we had been going out for about 2 years then and he took me to the movies, and tryed to pash me but it was more like he was trying to eat me!.but no i have moved on from that found a new lover,he is juts so kind and caring! i love him to bits and peaces! and i would do anything for him!
January 18th, 2008 at 6:21 pm
Slowly and passionately our lips met… then she crossed her legs and knocked my glasses off!
January 27th, 2008 at 3:37 am
oooooooh…..its so warm soft lovely and most expected when its cold outside. kissing on the right time just knocks down.
January 28th, 2008 at 12:47 am
Wow, i loved reading all these posts!
I’m only starting to kiss and I’m so glad I stumbled upon this!
February 11th, 2008 at 4:42 am
Thanks for the tips! Lot’s of your answers were poetry, really. I’ve never been kissed but I see it in the not-so-distant future so your advice will come in very handy.
February 17th, 2008 at 2:40 pm
Taking it slow and not too hard, maybe building but not necessarily. Thanks to my sister.
February 18th, 2008 at 12:34 pm
I think it’s not a question of do we love kissing or not. but does it have a meanning???? does it tuch my heart???? does it tuch my soul????? does it give me a positive feeling?????
February 28th, 2008 at 5:57 pm
Hello read much abt kissing; but never kissed an opposite gender in my life- not married; and religion does not allow to mix wth opposite gender as problems can arise as u se in so many above mentioned stories; i wish to find a suitable life partner one day who wud be a great KISSER! i have only experienced kiss of parents and sisters that was also exciting (sister) for me
March 28th, 2008 at 1:32 am
When you decide to really kiss someone who matters to you, there is desire. Passion comes next. What you choose to do after that depends on what you feel, think and how much you care. Kissing can be an end in itself or a beginning of intimacy unparallelled by any other experience.
July 27th, 2009 at 12:42 pm
I HAVE A QUESTION I HAVE ASKED MYSELF EVERYTIME A MAN HAS TRIED TO KISS ME.. DO MEN JUST WANT TO KISS A GIRL BECAUSE HE JUST WANTS TO PUT HER IN BED??