You’ve done everything right to find a date, from setting up your profile on an Internet site to letting your friends hook you up with potential partners. Finding a date might not be the problem it’s seeking men who are in it for the long haul that can be the real challenge. If you’re having trouble finding a partner who’s ready to commit it can make dating feel like you’re driving down a dead-end street, but before you give up on finding a man who is in it for the long haul, read on to learn how to find a long-term partner and what to do once you’ve found him.
When Seeking Men: Communicate Clearly and Effectively from the Beginning
If you want to find someone who is in it for the long haul be sure to discuss basic issues like your views on money, children and marriage before you commit to a long-term relationship. These aren’t topics you need to bring up on the first date but once you realize your partner is a potential long-term mate, check in and see if your values and what’s important to both of you in life is a match. Differences such as if one person wants kids and the other doesn’t, generally don’t change and usually aren’t negotiable.
When Seeking Men: Keep a Positive Attitude
Not all men are just interested in dating around, there are plenty out there who do want to commit and are in it for the long haul. The key is to find that person by keeping a positive attitude, your options open and your spirits up because just like women, men want to date someone who is happy to be around. Don’t get discouraged and keep dating; it sounds simple, but the best way to find the right partner is to have a large pool to choose from.
When Seeking Men: Stick to what you Want and Believe In
You have to know what you want and then give yourself permission to ask for it and realize you deserve it. You can’t see what the future holds for your relationship but the best thing to do is set your expectations from the beginning. If your new beau is already showing signs it’s hard for him to commit, be honest and let him know you’re looking for a long-term relationship. This will give him the option to step up or stop wasting your time (and his) and bow out gracefully. If he does tell you he isn’t ready to settle down, listen and believe him, instead of thinking his feelings will change sometime soon.
Seeking Men: Is he Ready to Commit?
If you’re seeking men who are in it for the long haul you need to make sure they aren’t afraid to commit and sees a future with you. Ask yourself if your partner has a shared vision of the both of you together. Does he have an ‘us’ mindset? When talking about future plans does he include you in them?
Once you’ve found him, and he’s in it for the long haul, nurture the relationship.
When you’re in it for the long haul the work doesn’t stop. You have to be willing to maintain that original passion that brought you both together in the first place. Continue to have date nights, talk about subjects other than work and the kids, and have a ‘check-in’ with your relationship every few months to make sure you both are still happy.