Try eHarmony today!

Already a member? Log in

  • Advice
  • Blog
  • Dating

  • Relationships

  • Using eHarmony

  • Dating Tips

  • About You

7 Keys to a Thriving Marriage

By Guest Contributors Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth Schmitz, YourTango

Young couple in love wrapped in plaid standing and embrace each other

Not only do we think marriage is here to stay, we think marriage is better than ever (if you know the ingredients needed to keep love alive and thriving).

Positive examples of marriage and long-term relationships abound — they are everywhere! Successful and long-term relationships are the single greatest contributors to social order in the world today.

Beyond compatibility, successful relationships require simple acts, gestures, and conversations.

So join the ranks of other happy couples. Here are the seven key ingredients for a successful marriage:

1. Togetherness

In successful marriage it is not you and me, it is WE! Two separate people become one team, without losing their individual identities. Compromise is a part of daily living in a marriage. No one can have it all his or her way.

2. Respect

Happy marriages focus on mutual love and respect. Respecting your spouses individuality and opinion is critical to building a love that lasts.

3. Truthfulness

Couples talk about anything and everything. In successful marriage there are no sacred cows — no secrets. When difficult issues arise, successfully married couples have open discussions, solve issues jointly and never go to bed mad.

4. Joint Finances

In successful marriage it is “OUR money.” It is NOT “your money” and “my money.” Never make a major purchase without talking it over with your spouse and then sleeping on it. Pay all of your bills together. It’s important that both of you understand your finances.

5. Fitness

Successfully married couples understand that taking care of just themselves physically is not sufficient. You must also promote the good health of your spouse. To live until “death do us part” requires a mutual concern about one another’s good health. Using common sense about what you put into your body, getting proper exercise, rest, and relaxation is beneficial to the health of both of you.

6. The Power of Touch

In successful marriage touching says, “I love you so much I simply must touch you.” Touching each other multiple times per day is the norm. Use touch as your Morse code and create an exclamation mark of your love.

7. Surprise

Marriages characterized by variety and spice are the best. Successful marriage is exciting — rarely boring — and full of unpredictable things. Don’t always do that which is predictable. Upend expectations. Variety is the spice of life!

There is nothing mysterious or mystical about building a love that lasts. But the truth is, too many couples don’t understand or won’t do the simple things required to make their marriage work. In the end, a successful marriage is all about doing the simple things day in and day out. Start today. You won’t regret it.

More at YourTango:

Science Confirms: Happy Wife Does Equal Happy Life

50 Best Marriage Tips of All Time

3 Ways Skype Can Save a Troubled Marriage

 

 

Article originally posted at YourTango


If this article gave you the confidence to find your match, try eHarmony today!

Join Now


More like this:

By posting a comment, I agree to the Community Standards.
Need help with eHarmony.com?