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Ten Things Women Never Want to Hear on a First Date

by eHarmony Staff

From his ex to telling you how to dress, there are just some words he shouldn’t utter on a first date! If he does, run…!

"I’ve actually never been in a serious or long-term relationship.”

Unless you are both twenty, this is a sign that he may either have commitment issues or another yet-to-be-revealed personality flaw. By the time most of us are in our thirties, we have some sort of love experiences under our belt. Be prepared for some fireworks (not the good kind!) if you choose to keep dating this guy.

“I hate labels like ‘girlfriend.’”

If you don’t catch this red flag, beware ladies. This is code for, “I am likely to never commit to you and I am not the settling down type of guy.” So if you are the settling type of girl, lose his number.

“My ex is actually home watching my kids right now.”

If a guy goes on and on about his ex, what a great relationship they have, and you get the sense that she is still very involved in his life, this might not be a good selection for your next potential boyfriend. The risk is fairly high that they will get back together, and you will be left broken-hearted.

“I’d love to see you in a dress next time.”

Alert: if on a first date a guy tells you what he’d like to see you in or what you should be doing in any fashion, stay clear. He doesn’t know you well enough to comment on such things, and this is a potential early sign that he could be a control freak. Yuck.

“Can you believe she put out a restraining order on me?”

First, it’s much too early to reveal such information when you are just getting to know someone. Second, this is an obvious sign that he may not be the most balanced individual. Third, it is likely he doesn’t take responsibility for his actions. There are exceptions to the rule, of course, but do you want to stick around and find out if he is one?

“My friend John is such a jerk. He really pissed me off last night...”

“Wow, is he really talking about his friends like that?” you think. People are usually on their best behavior on a first date, so watch out for this potential negative Ned – who could also be a gossiper.

“Let’s hang out again tomorrow.”

You just met. Let things simmer. Does he have a full and independent life of his own? Hmmm…play it cool. This guy could be a stage five clinger, so look out.

“Actually, I still live with my ex.”

You have our permission to run right out of the coffee house, restaurant, or wherever you are. Don’t even go there, friends, it’s too complicated (at least for us).

“I’d like you to meet my good friend Mike.”

Did he actually tell his friend to come on down during your first date? Believe us, it happens more than you think. He’s clueless, careless or incredibly immature – none of which fall into the “good” category.

“I don’t really have any hobbies.”

Wow. I think one thing we all want is someone who has a passion for something. Feel free to put this guy into the “one date only” category.

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