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Seven Signs They May Be a Control Freak

by eHarmony Staff

It can seem endearing in the beginning … he calls to check up on you and say hi, and takes care of all of the arrangements for your night out. But is he prince charming or a closet control freak? Here are some signs to be aware of.



It’s Their Way or No Way

Does this person insist on being right? Are they a know-it-all? Do they have a nearly impossible time listening to another’s point of view? If this is the case, you are likely looking at someone with some control issues.

They Love Their Schedule...

and they really don’t love when you try to switch things up last minute! Controlling individuals may have a hard time with spontaneity, as they like to orchestrate the environment around them as much as possible – and sometimes – the person they are with. Look out for someone who’s so rigid they can’t let go and enjoy a spur-of-the-moment activity.

They Like to Feel like King (or Queen) of the Relationship

A healthy relationship is a balanced and equal partnership. Anyone who expects you to look up to them, listen to their every word or even tells you what you need to be doing in any aspect of life, could very well be a control freak.

They Need You – 24/7

A controlling person isn’t usually a super independent one. At first it may seem endearing when they call you three times a day to say hi, but this will quickly turn into “clinginess” and eventually a possessive pattern. Not only will they want to know where you are, but who you are with – and may even try to keep you away from certain friends they don’t approve of. It’s a dangerous path to go down, so beware.

Their Lives are Chaotic

They can’t control what happens at work, or with their finances and their lives are usually borderline out of hand. This is all the more reason they might try to control something, and that something could be you. Looking for a balanced person with a healthy life is your best bet to avoid this type of personality.

They Are Critical – Of You

Another way some individuals control others is through slowly attacking their partner’s self esteem. Constant criticism of minor things, like how you dress, how you clean the house, or even how you speak, can eventually wear anyone down. Watch out for the person who loves to tell you how you are doing things wrong.

They Display Extreme Jealousy

A controlling person is often very insecure about their relationship, and can quickly get possessive of their partner. The bottom line: If any of this sounds familiar to you, read on to learn more about controlling relationships, and how to cope.

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