Dating doesn’t have to be daunting as long as you know how the game has changed. It’s not that different than you remember, either. The key is putting yourself out there.
If you’ve been out of the dating scene for awhile, being thrust back into it after a divorce or following the death of a spouse can be daunting indeed. No, you don’t have to hang out in bars or clubs to find a date (although that’s one possible way to meet someone). There are plenty of other ways to meet people, so step out and try something new!
1. Get Online
These days, you don’t have to go very far from home to put yourself out there. Now, more than ever, people are turning to the Internet as a place to meet. There are message boards and chat rooms galore, and you can join groups that focus on your interests. Whatever reservations people used to have about online dating are a thing of the past. As thousands of people can testify, it really is possible to meet your soul mate online. Making that connection may be the first step in forming a new relationship.
2. Change your Routine
It’s easy to get into a rut when you’re living alone, especially if you don’t feel like socializing. But seeing your single status as a chance for discovery will not only expand your life, it also will help you meet people. Join a club that sponsors monthly programs and group excursions, such as the local Audubon Society. Take an art class; even if it turns out that you aren’t much of an artist, you’ll meet new people and learn new skills. Start going to church, and participate in the after-service coffee hour. Or sign up for a tour to someplace you’ve always wanted to go. Think of your new adventures not as a quest to find Mr. or Ms. Right, but as an
3. Prepare for Ups and Downs
Once you are back in the dating groove, there’s no guarantee that you’ll have one positive experience after another. Enduring a string of bad dates with potential partners who don’t make the grade can be discouraging, and there will be times when you’re just plain tired of making the effort. Don’t be afraid to take a break and use the time to nourish yourself and recoup whatever self-esteem you may have lost in the process. You can’t put your best foot forward unless you are feeling good about yourself, so do whatever it takes to stay optimistic and upbeat.
4. Have Fun!
Although you may view your reentry into the dating scene with trepidation at first, it’s important that you learn to have fun with these new experiences. Initially, don’t be focused on the goal of finding a steady partner or a spouse. Instead, look forward to each new encounter as a chance to meet someone new and to expand your circle of friends and acquaintances. If you proceed with an open mind, you just might be surprised at what is out there waiting for you! Love might even be sweeter the second time around.