Ladies: What Men Think About Your Body

by Grant Langston, Senior Director, eHarmony

Does he care about your crow’s feet…or if you have rock-hard abs? We’re revealing what’s important to men about you physically, ladies! Spoiler: It’s good news!

What Men Think About Your Body: Sexy is as Sexy Does

A great point was made by a guy I talked to recently. He said beyond the physical, if a woman carried herself with great confidence and felt sexy, that made her much more attractive and desirable to him. Attitude can make a big difference. If you feel sexy ladies, you become sexier to your male counterparts.

Guys, (besides the obvious!) what do you find sexy about a woman? Her style? Clothing? Hair? What else?

What Men Think About Your Body: Your Figure

Men want a woman who has a figure – who fills a dress with curves and a feminine form. Of course to a large degree your size is determined by genetics. Some people are naturally thin. Some are naturally larger. So, it may be practically impossible for you to become thin, no matter how good your discipline or intentions. But having a “figure” – a certain proportion between your hips, waist, and bust – is most likely within reach (even if it is hard work getting there).

Honestly, that’s what we’re interested in. Many women quite rightly point out that Marilyn Monroe was a size 12 (or 16 depending on whom you ask) and that no one thought she was overweight. This is, of course, completely true and makes the point that proportionality creates the feminine form in the mind of a man.

What Men Think About Your Body: Wrinkles

I once met a very famous movie actress who was, at that time, probably in her early fifties. As I approached from a distance, I could see that she was stunning. Thanks to the camera and makeup one can never be too sure how a person is going to render in real life, but she was truly beautiful. As I got very close, was introduced and shook her hand, I could see that her face was quite lined with wrinkles, laugh lines, and signs of her age. She had clearly not had any “work done.” Even at close range these signs of aging had no effect on her beauty. They were visible, and established that she wasn’t 25 anymore, but did nothing to detract from her attractiveness.

While there are probably extreme cases…wrinkles generally don’t destroy beauty. I’ve never heard a guy say, “I used to be into her but her face got so many wrinkles.” We just don’t care.

What Men Think About Your Body: Tone, Cellulite and Muscles

There is nothing wrong with the gym. Staying healthy, lean and mean is all great. But a killer six pack? 3% body fat? Yawn. I’ve NEVER had a male friend say, “She’s great, and she can bench 120.”

There’s no getting around the fact that fitness matters. Fit women can have some fat, fit women have muscle, but they also have TONE and tone makes everything work. The cellulite you are obsessing about on the back of your thighs - is just not a big deal to us. We're looking at the whole package.

What Men Think About Your Body: Your Hair

Don’t get me wrong. It’s great that you have hair, and that it is clean and styled in a somewhat current fashion. But other than that most men aren’t too caught up in the color or shape of things. This is precisely why we may not notice when you visit the salon and get new highlights!

One caveat: There has been an ongoing debate about the length of a woman’s hair. Many guys will insist that they like longer hair, and for a certain age range that’s a fair observation. But over the years things change…and for some women (and certainly for most men) there comes a time when long hair just doesn’t work anymore.

What Men Think About Your Body: Your Style, Mom Jeans and Shoes!

There was alot of talk about a woman's personal style. The general consenus was that yes, putting effort into one's style is important. Knowing how to dress for your body type -- a huge bonus! Mom jeans were mentioned as an absolute no-no, as was footwear like hiking boots or Crocs. I’m not talking about high fashion. I’m not talking about odd-looking clothes that are trendy. In fact, what I’m talking about is the opposite of trendy. It’s timeless. It’s about clothes that fit and aren’t baggy. It’s about clothes that accentuate your figure in the best ways. Dressing with a sense of style takes your natural beauty and celebrates it.

What Men Think About Your Body: Your So-Called Flaws

The features you see as flaws we often find unique and intriguing. I can remember seeing a woman with a slightly crooked front tooth and thinking -- how sweet and charming. Embracing what makes you different can be a very attractive quality.

What Men Think About Your Body: A Disclaimer

When it comes to the physical form of our significant others, what do men expect? What do we want? What do we care about, and what doesn’t matter to us at all?

There are exceptions to EVERYTHING. What we’re not talking about here is the male “ideal.” That whole concept muddies the water because of the wide range of women that create lust in men. Without a doubt men are attracted to Keira Knightley or Jessica Alba. But most men don’t need a model to feel turned-on. They don’t need a perfect Vogue-magazine body to feel the animal attraction that is so important to a relationship. Following are some things that do matter to most of us...

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