Most of us regular guys fear we’re just not “cool” enough to meet and date great women. But does “cool” really matter all that much…and if so, where do we get more of it? David D. reveals the surprising answers.
Let’s face it…from James Bond to Jason Bourne, movies have always made most guys feel like “cool” is something we don’t have enough of…can’t get more of…and are doomed to fail with women because of. Even worse: our attempts to fake “being cool” ruin our real opportunities to build relationships with great women.
So, what exactly does it mean to be “cool” in the real world to real women — and does it really matter to them all that much?
First the “bad” news:
YES. A man’s “cool” definitely matters to women. But here’s the good news…
ANY man can cultivate the kind of “cool” women actually care about by taking just a few simple steps. Because, despite what TV and movies would have us believe, the only “cool” that really matters to a woman isn’t about swagger, looks or money…
It’s about a man’s ability to CONNECT EMOTIONALLY with her.
That in mind, here’s what every regular guy can do to become off-the-hook “cool” in the eyes of great women.
FIND FULFILLMENT IN YOUR OWN LIFE FIRST. I know…easier said than done, right? But there’s no escaping it. Until a man feels fulfilled in his own life, there’s no way he can connect in a meaningful way with a woman. However, once he does feel more fulfilled, the qualities of “cool” that create connections with women begin to flow from him almost automatically.
Suddenly he stops acting defensive and goal tending against perceived threats and challenges. He’s comfortable in his own skin, and it’s reflected in everything from his personal style to his body language. He projects “easy-going” and “casual” instead of “tense” and “posed.”
So take a look at your life…what would it take to make you feel more fulfilled? Accomplishing a neglected goal? A career change? A new place to live? Better health and fitness?
Whatever it is, taking the first steps goes a long way toward making you feel more fulfilled… and more “cool”.
PUMP UP YOUR *INNER* STRENGTH.
We’re not talking about muscle-power here. And “inner strength” never means being aggressive, abusive or rude. The kind of strength I’m talking about, the kind that translates into genuine “cool,” is the kind a man uses to project personal confidence, control, and leadership. It means being unaffected by the opinions of others. Seeing situations for what they really are (without bias, bitterness or paranoia) so you can take mature, decisive action. It means having the strength to do your own thing while encouraging others to do theirs.
So…how do you “pump up” your inner strength?
Like any muscle, USE it. Start taking action to get where you want to go in life instead of just sitting on the sidelines, worrying, rethinking and second-guessing everything. Do just this much, and you’ll be amazed how easily you start connecting emotionally with everyone around you…including great women.
SHOW YOU CARE IN THE *RIGHT* WAY.
Too many guys think that if they woke up one morning looking like Brad Pitt and having all his money, suddenly they’d have no problem acting “cool.” These guys couldn’t be more wrong. The true currency of “cool” is something else entirely. It’s learning how to care about another person…and show it in the right way. If you’re thinking about a woman you care about when she’s not around, make sure to tell her. Communicate in specifics about how she makes you feel. If your caring is real, you’ll never come across as more “cool” than when you share these feelings with her.
Bottom line: Women (and everyone else) want to be around cool people.
But true “cool” can’t be faked, bought or manufactured.
A cool guy is one who’s feeling fulfilled in his own life…and therefore open, generous and caring enough to connect with a woman on an emotional level. He understands her wants, works together with her on her needs, and supports her feelings. It’s just that simple to “be cool”… and to start succeeding in life and love like you never thought possible.
Acclaimed author David DeAngelo cracked the “secret code” as to why some men are effortlessly successful with women while most endure painful frustration and failure. David shares his most powerful tips and tools for how ANY man can find his inner “cool” to become more successful with women and dating in his FREE newsletter. Subscribe to it here.