What is also interesting is the advice they have for others going onto eHarmony, because it is very often the same. Here are the five tips that nearly every couple has offered:

1. Make sure you are ready to commit. If you are, then you need to commit to eHarmony as well. Translation: Be patient with the process, and it will pay off. You are looking for lifetime love, and this isn’t something that usually happens overnight.

The amount of time it took before these couples met really varied — for some it was only two weeks, for others, two or four months. One guy even stayed on the site for two years until he met his now-wife. And he told me it was absolutely worth it. But every single one of them mentioned patience as an absolute must.

2.  Be completely honest when filling out the questionnaire and profile. One woman told me she wasn’t getting matches she thought were a fit for her initially. She remembered that when she filled out the questionnaire, she wasn’t in a great mood. So she called customer care and requested that she take it over again. She did, and met her now-husband a month later on the site.

I have heard this point made from many people – that they just put it all out there, they really thought through their answers and were completely focused as they put their profiles together.

3. Know what you are looking for. One man told me he considered all of his past relationships and actually wrote down the things he liked about the women he had dated, and what qualities were not a fit for him. This helped him clarify what he wanted. He then made a list of the values and character he wanted in his partner. I think the key here is that he got totally clear about what was going to work for him and created his intention. He met his now-wife on eHarmony about four months later.

4. Look at what you have to offer and make sure you feel good about yourself.  A guy I met last weekend, Norman (who will be in our newest commercials with his wife Angela in a few months) told me that he went onto eHarmony twice. The first time he wasn’t really in a good place – not happy with himself in many areas, emotionally or physically. When he asked himself what he had to offer someone else and the answer was, “not much,” he left the site and took about two years to get his life together and achieve some personal goals. He then returned and was connected with his gorgeous wife.

5. Keep coming back! As one guy put it, “Sometimes it’s just the wrong time of year, the wrong season, or you have hit a dry spell. Come back to it later. I just put it down and came back to it.” His third time on eHarmony turned out to, in fact, be the charm – he finally met his wife.

The overall takeaway for me was that all of these couples were absolutely ready to find a lifelong partner. They didn’t half-ass it. They all put a lot of thought, time and energy into the whole process, and understood that being patient and having a positive attitude was necessary. They were also self-reflective and aware of what they were looking for, wanting to be sure that they had something to bring to the table as well. It wasn’t all about what someone else had to offer them.

I would love to hear from any eHarmony success couples about what advice they have to offer!

Image of eHarmony success couple Angela and Norman, courtesy of Alice Hu.

The post ‘How eHarmony Worked for Me’: Five Tips from Couples Who Found Love appeared first on eHarmony Blog.

Everyone dates online for different reasons. However, many people – especially those who choose a site like eHarmony – get online because they’re looking for the right person. You can definitely meet the love of your life online, and many people have. However, doing so becomes much tougher if you make the following common mistakes.

1. Having Unrealistic Expectations

If you’ve ever heard singles bemoan their online dating experiences, you’ll notice that most of the things they complain about are annoying but unavoidable aspects of dating online. For example, they may lament that people don’t turn out like their profiles, that they get emails (or matches) from those who aren’t their type, or that there was no chemistry on the first date. It’s hard to meet that right person if the challenges of online dating scare you away.

The above challenges are all completely normal experiences when dating online. Sometimes, it helps to change your expectations and accept that you will meet people who don’t do it for you, who are deceptive in their profiles, or who don’t take the process seriously. Online dating is an adventure, and viewing it that way can make it much more fun. Once you meet that right person, it will all be worth it!

2. Chasing Your Ideal

Online dating sites offer you a myriad of categories for choosing the kind of person you’re looking for. This, along with the sheer number of people dating online, makes it extremely tempting to target your ideal partner rather than remain open to meeting a variety of people who could turn out to be amazing.

For example, you may ideally want a younger woman or a tall guy; but when it comes down to it, you’re willing to date a woman who’s a couple years older or a man who’s not so tall. If you narrow your criteria to your ideals, you will have a hard time finding anyone to date, much less finding someone really amazing. Instead, broaden your criteria to include anyone you’re willing to meet at least once. You never know who might surprise you!

3. Being Negative

One way to turn off potential prospects is to make negative statements in your profile. For example, it’s not uncommon to see things like, “I don’t want drama” or, “I only date gentlemen.” Sure, you don’t want a drama queen or a jerky guy, but stating that in your profile makes you look jaded and will scare away the healthy, good people you seek. Not the best way to attract the right person!

Instead, remove any negativity from your profile and focus on the positive. Sure, online dating means occasionally coming into contact with the kind of people you were hoping to scare away, but that’s normal. Fortunately, you can choose to delete their emails or refuse to see them again.

4. Giving Generic Answers in Your Profile

From time to time, I will get online and peruse people’s profiles. While some of them are cringe-worthy, most are actually quite decent…but suffer from one problem: they’re generic. For example, I commonly see statements like “I’m most passionate about my friends and family” or “My friends tell me I’m loyal, fun, and kind.” These may be very true statements, but they don’t tell others that much about the unique person you are. And if you don’t convey your uniqueness, how will your perfect match ever find you?

Instead, give people the juicy specifics that make you unique and interesting. For example, instead of “friends and family,” are you passionate about eating dinner with your family every Sunday night or going mountain biking with your buddies from work? And instead of being “loyal, funny, and kind,” would your friends report that you’ll watch their dogs anytime they leave town, that you’re the best joke teller ever, or that you’re a great gift-giver? When you offer details like this, it’s much easier to draw in others, including the one who’s perfect for you.

Online dating is a great way to meet people you would never otherwise meet. Go in with realistic expectations, optimize your profile, and keep an open mind…eventually, you will find someone special.

Learn more about Dr. Christie Hartman and her two books – Find the Love of Your Life Online and Changing Your Game, a Man’s Guide to Success with Women.

The post Want To Find The Love of Your Life Online? Avoid These Four Mistakes! appeared first on eHarmony Blog.

I had completely assumed (wrongly!) that by now people would know all of the dos and don’ts regarding dating profile photos. I have seen so many articles about this topic, and published many myself.

Regardless of whether they should or not, people are going to make judgments based on your photos. So please try and avoid the following…

• No blurry pics, no dark images (where your face is shaded), no oversaturated shots, no flash-induced “demon eyes” or pics of you with your eyes closed (!)

• No costumes! It might be funny to you, but to someone that doesn’t know you, it can just look strange.

• Not so many sunglasses shots! I saw several profiles where people had six photos uploaded, and in five of them, they were wearing shades. If you are trying to show off your favorite place in the world, which happens to be the beach, glasses are cool. But remember, your matches want to see your eyes too.

• No time-stamping, unless it is within the last six months or so. I saw dates on photos from 2009. Not good.

• No party shots. I saw MANY shots of people looking a little toasty, martini glass in hand. One could draw the conclusion that if you put a photo like this in your profile, partying is a big part of your life.

• No photos of you with a member of the opposite sex – without any explanation. Some people posted their main profile photo this way. They did not use the text feature where you can explain who the person was, either. This obviously leads many to wonder…who is this mystery guest? An ex? Your main profile photo should really just be you. Oh, and not you and your BFF, either.

• No images where you have clearly cut out the person next to you, or even better, photoshopped their face out. Yes, I saw both examples. Many times.

• No self-portraits with your smart phone. Especially in the bathroom or car. Not many people want to see the inside of either.

• No extreme close-ups, or scrunchy face shots, or photos taken as you stick out your tongue. It’s not a good look for most of us.

• No hunting photos, or shots of you holding any sort of weapons. I’ve got one word for this: Scary!

Those were the most common issues I saw. Most of us have pretty decent cameras with us (smart phones), so there is no real good excuse for poor quality images anymore. Just set aside some time with an honest, trusted friend, and take some pics of yourself. A nice headshot or medium shot for your main cover photo — and always include a full-length body shot as well.

It is very hard to convey a big personality through pictures. Sometimes what you intend will be taken the wrong way. Let your dates learn how amazing, funny or unique you are in person.

That said, please put energy and time into your photos, because they are very important.

Here are some additional articles we have done on the subject:

Posting your best cover photo

Terrible profile photos and the women who post them

Terrible profile photos and the men who post them

What have you seen in dating profiles that turned you off?

The post Why Your Online Dating Profile Photos May Be Hurting Your Chances appeared first on eHarmony Blog.

Through this method I’ve found wonderful relationships that lasted years, been on first (and last!) dates that still to this day make me cringe, and have made lasting friendships that thrive today. I love and believe in online dating…but will be the first to admit that sometimes it ain’t easy!

In my role at eHarmony, I’ve talked with and observed conversations between thousands of singles via eHarmony’s Facebook page, Twitter, and in other social media outlets and online forums. Over time, I’ve observed (and lived!) the many ways in which we online daters are our own worst enemies and play a critical role in our own lack of success.

In the interest of seeing more of us succeed in our quest for love, I am putting it all out on the line – pouring my heart out to share these observations and tips with you. Please know that I’m in the trenches right along with you, and the things I’m about to discuss – including the “tough love” I’m about to dish – applies to me as much as to many of you.

Here are five ways we online daters are our own worst enemies:

1.  We’re really not that into it…

Some of us feel badly about “having to resort to online dating” to find the person we’re looking for. To be honest, we REALLY need to get over that. Not only is the stigma dead and buried (as well it should be!) but we’ve reached the point where we live so much of our lives online that it’s SMART to employ technology to help you find a happy relationship. Some of us go into it assuming it’s not going to work, that it’s going to be a waste of time (and often money) and that we’ll end up ultimately disappointed with the outcome – and still single, to boot. It’s a very easy trap to fall into and it takes conscious effort and work to not only keep a positive attitude and believe that it will work, but to maintain that positivity during the inevitable ups and downs during this process.

Take everything you’re about to do very seriously — for example, commit a couple of hours to answering those 200+ questions we ask at eHarmony. Consider each question and answer with what IS true, vs. what you WISH was true about yourself. It’s absolutely critical that you be completely honest in answering those questions, as THAT is the basis on which we match you with other singles on our site. To illustrate just how important this is, I’ll share a story: I recently had the good fortune of being on set for our new eHarmony commercial shoot, and talked with our couples. It completely changed the way I look at online dating. As we talked with each couple, themes emerged and “honesty” — both with ourselves about who we are and what we want, as well as with our matches – was a major theme in these couples stories of success. This process, particularly on eHarmony, is like anything in life: You get out of it what you put into it.

2.  Our profiles are “meh” — or, are rife with vagaries and negativities

You answered all the questions honestly and filled out your profile/uploaded a few photos. You’re getting lots of views to your profile, but no one’s communicating. Definitely frustrating. Clearly none of your matches are serious about this process, they’re all shallow and looking for a man (or a woman) who’s:  ______ (insert any one trait you think you don’t possess:  richer, taller, thinner, younger, etc. )

So, just what is the common denominator here, then? You guessed it…YOU. Or, more accurately, your profile. How do you feel about the profile you’ve created? Is it robust and does it include multiple recent photos that accurately convey you as you are TODAY (or at least very recently)? Is it free of typos/grammatical errors? Does it use cliche answers to critical questions? (“I’m passionate about so many things, it’s really hard to pick just one.” “I’m really not sure what people first notice about me….I’ll have to get back to you on that one.”)

This is your chance to demonstrate that you’re a good communicator. When you’re given an opportunity to be creative and stand out in a positive way, why wouldn’t you take it? Does your profile speak to who you are without expressing any negativity about you or your potential dates/matches — or prior romantic partners? There’s virtually no better way to repel great matches than by filling a profile with overt negativity toward the opposite sex, online dating, the dating process, or relationships in general. Don’t talk about what you don’t want — talk about the qualities you seek in a partner, and the good qualities you offer in return. If you need help with this, a close friend or family member of the opposite gender is a great place to start.

And a quick word on photos…the more, the better. They should be recent and captioned with dates. They should be varied — some closer up, some full body.  And finally, PLEASE do everyone (especially yourself!) a favor and resist the urge to take photos in your bathroom mirror. And if you must take them, please don’t post them on your profile! These are almost never flattering photos and they leave your match wondering, “Doesn’t he (or she) have anyone in their life who can snap a decent photo of them?”

Finally, I would be remiss in discussing this topic without mentioning one of the chief complaints that members express to us, that their matches are non-paying members who can’t communicate with them. In many cases that may be true, since we do offer everyone who joins the site the chance to review their matches for free before communicating — but we work very hard to provide affordable opportunities for subscriptions to anyone who wants them. And we have reams of data which prove that when someone sees a match they truly want to communicate with, they WILL subscribe.

3.  Our expectations are too high, in a couple of very damaging ways.

It seems that many of us expect to either rarely or even never face rejection as part of the process — and we often take it very personally, even harmfully internalizing it when we are rejected. Remember, rejection is part of the process. Just as you won’t feel moved to communicate with ALL of your matches, not every one of your matches will want to communicate with you, and that’s okay. If someone closes you out as a match, all it means is that they weren’t the one for you. It’s not a sign that you’re “undateable”, that you’ll “always be alone” or that “love’s just not for you.” While it’s easy to get negative when a rejection happens, it’s critical that you don’t go there — otherwise you’ll be putting negative energy out there about yourself — and in doing so, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy.

In his renowned career planning book What Color Is Your Parachute?, author Richard Bolles once included the picture of a typical job search, an entire page of his book that contained the following:

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO YES

The search for love can look a lot like this as well. And in both cases the thing that really counts is the YES. It makes all the NO’s you had to go through to get there (be it one closed match, or a few less than great dates, or some promising prospects who up and disappear) completely worthwhile in the end. You can’t expect it to happen overnight. While some people are lucky and are matched to their love quickly, the vast majority have to wait a bit longer.

4. We often fail to “keep our eye on the ball.”

As we evaluate our matches, many of us get hung up on things that in the long run are not terribly important to a happy long-term relationship. Our service is designed to dig into the things that DO promote long-term satisfaction in relationships, and match you up with others who score similarly in those areas. Even if the profile doesn’t shine with awesome, (and many don’t, since people are notoriously bad at writing about themselves) if we’ve matched you, the potential IS there. Maybe they’re a couple of years older than you hoped, or he’s not quite as tall as you’d like…sticking doggedly to a “type” when your goal is to find a long-term relationship is a recipe for failure.

Now, this isn’t to say that you should date someone you do not find at all attractive or who lives 1500 miles away just because they might be a wonderful person. But if all signs are a go except one thing — and that one thing is not something that lends itself to long-term relationship satisfaction — you’re simply not taking an active role in your own success if you don’t at least try to talk to that person. Love is often found where you least expect it, and can come in a package that isn’t quite as tall, or is a few years older, or a few miles further away than you thought it would be.

5.  Dead end communicator…

So, you’ve put together a sparkling profile, one that virtually oozes with indicators of just how terrific a person and partner you are. You’re rocking a bunch of recent, varied photos. You’re getting attention – so much so, it’s almost hard to keep up with replying to everyone who writes you. Even if there’s temptation to reply only to the people who are REALLY interesting to you – don’t. Reply to everyone. Even if it’s a simple, “Thanks so much but I don’t think we’d be a good match – I wish you the best of luck!”

Everyone deserves to be acknowledged. They were probably excited to reach out to you, and to do so and simply not hear back is probably one of the most disheartening parts of online dating, so don’t do that to someone else. As for the matches you’re excited to communicate with, be sure to be an exciting and engaging communicator. Glance over their profile and personalize your approach. Be sure to end with a question about them, so they have a reason to want to respond to you. Before you hit “send,” read your message and ask, “Would this make ME want to hit ‘reply’?”

Sometimes over the course of communication, like after one or two dates that are clearly not leading anywhere, there’s a temptation to just disappear. Again…don’t. There’s a lot of debate about the most appropriate format for breaking off conversation at various stages of the online dating process, but the bottom line is it’s unspeakably rude to just leave someone hanging. You wouldn’t want someone you were interested in to do that to you, would you? Then don’t do it to anyone else. It’s common courtesy to at least send a text or an email to close things off.

Thus ends my rant, manifesto, whatever you want to call it. Go forth and be kind. Relax and seek out the FUN in the process. All easier said than done sometimes, but all entirely worth the effort and it will not just make for a better dating experience – it’ll make you a better person and partner in the process.

Have you been guilty of any of these online dating behaviors? What have you learned that you would like to share with others?

The post Why We Online Daters Are Our Own Worst Enemies appeared first on eHarmony Blog.

One of the many benefits of trying a match-based online dating site like eHarmony is that they pair you with people you’re more likely to mesh with. And while it’s natural to want to meet someone you find attractive and have something in common with, ideally you want someone you click with on a deeper level, someone whose personality and values are compatible with yours.

However, if you’re new to online dating or unaccustomed to match-based sites, you may find that some of the matches you receive aren’t what you expected. And managing expectations is one of the biggest challenges in online dating.

Match-based sites attempt to match singles based on factors that lead to attraction and compatibility. Yet, when people receive their match profiles, some are surprised (and not in a good way) at what they get. Here are some of the comments I’ve heard:

“I’m a cyclist who’s on my bike five days a week. What do I have in common with an overweight woman who doesn’t work out?”

“The site matched me a bunch of guys who love to travel. I’m not really into travel.”

“I’m a city guy, but I keep getting matched with women who love the outdoors.”

“I have a Bachelor’s degree! Why would they match me with men who never went to college?”

I’m not knocking these comments; they’re the natural result of the online dating experience being different than what you expected.

It’s easy to fill out your profile and questionnaire and assume you’re going to get the opposite sex version of yourself, or at least the kind of people you’re used to dating. But match-based sites attempt to match people on criteria above and beyond how cute someone looks in a photo or a mutual love of running or science fiction. Yes, you will get matched with people who aren’t your usual type.

And that’s the point: to break free of your idea of the perfect mate, and meet people who you click with but never expected to. As any matchmaker will tell you: Mr. or Ms. Right will rarely look like you imagined.

The cyclist may be incompatible with an overweight woman, but he probably doesn’t need an athletic woman to be happy. References to travel and the outdoors are ubiquitous in dating profiles – but everyone has a different idea of what “travel” and “outdoorsy” mean, and who’s to say their definition won’t jive with yours? And education? Hey, I have a PhD, and one of the most successful guys I ever dated never went to college.

Just as in regular dating,  some matches you receive on an online dating site won’t be right for you. However, you’ll have a chance to meet people you wouldn’t otherwise meet and who are different than you’re used to, but who mesh well with you in the areas that matter. Maybe you don’t love to travel, don’t care about the outdoors, or value education – but the person sitting across from you at the coffee house may be so interesting that you won’t care.

So put aside your mental image of your ideal match. Check out your matches: if you see any red flags, then move on. If you find someone even a little attractive or interesting, and they feel the same way, set up a meeting. Go in with an open mind. See who winds up sitting across from you. They may not wind up being for you, but that’s okay. Eventually, you’ll connect with that amazing person.

Learn more about Dr. Christie Hartman and her two books – Find the Love of Your Life Online and Changing Your Game, a Man’s Guide to Success with Women.

The post The Biggest Challenge in Online Dating: Your Own Expectations appeared first on eHarmony Blog.

As we looked at the version 1 releases for our mobile products, we saw them as providing our customers with a solid, functional experience. You could complete any of the critical onsite actions that you needed to, now on the go.

However, as we were nearing the end of our planning for the 1.0 wave, the product and design teams wanted to take a step back and really think about what a next generation eHarmony experience might look like on mobile. This became especially important as Apple had released the first generation of the iPad and it shattered all expectations about mobile and tablet computing.

So we asked ourselves, “What if we completely re-imagined what our service looked like from a visual ID and interaction perspective?”

We set about answering that question during the creation of our new eHarmony HD iPad application.
We started by reexamining the core of what eHarmony is, and what people all over the world see in our brand. Looking back over the years, through all the customer research and success couple interviews, there were a few terms that kept coming up over and over again — Warm, Real, and Elegant. We felt that those particular adjectives represented the core of what our eHarmony web experience strives to be, and these were terms that had the ability to illicit strong feelings in our customers.

So our design and product teams partnered with an outside design shop called JacksonFishMarket, and we wrestled with these basic questions: How do you build an experience that makes our customers actually feel something when they use it? How can you build an eHarmony experience that is Warm, Real and Elegant?

When we thought about “warm” experiences outside of software, one experience jumped to mind – Starbucks. Beyond being a place where countless couples go on their first dates, Starbucks has created an incredibly warm and inviting environment, no matter the store, no matter the country. When you enter a store, you are surrounded by warm colors and great lighting; the baristas always greet you with a smile and are sure to learn your name before making your drink. And when they make you your drink, they will literally make you whatever you want. In short, you feel great and welcome while you’re there.

In our experience, we tried to capture the same feeling through our color choices, fonts and voice. In a sea of blue dating sites, we opted to go with a color palette that used natural or earth tones. Where possible, we used handwritten fonts and our tone/voice is more informal – making you feel like we’re having a conversation with you and you alone. We also made sure to be there whenever our customers need assistance, while remaining unobtrusive for our more experienced customers. For instance, a new user will notice how we gently inform and remind them of the importance of a complete profile throughout their first week on the service. We don’t constantly harass them, but every few logins, we’ll ask them to complete one bite-sized element of their profile.

For our next value, “real”, we thought it would be a bit easier to translate into a software experience. The idea of being real or authentic is at the core of all of our creative and brand imagery. We use real success couples in our ads and even strive for a straightforward tone in the voiceover talent we use. So, our team made a design choice to use real items throughout the experience, because real items are things that people ascribe value to versus just pixels on a screen. So in our new iPad HD experience, you’ll see things like Polaroids, folders, and ink throughout. All of these items are found on a natural, comfortable desktop experience; one in which hope our customers would feel right at home.

The form factor also comes into play here. It’s no secret that the iPad is a wonderful device for consuming digital books. It feels natural to swipe through the pages of book when reading an iBook on the device. And so, we transformed core elements of the user experience, the Relationship Questionnaire and the Personality Profile, into a digital “book” experience. As you use those two features, you’re literally turning pages of a digital book, but it all feels incredibly realistic because it’s all second-nature when you’re using an iPad.

Finally, there are lots of elegant or premium software experiences out there. Companies like Apple or Tiffany’s come to mind when you ask people about elegant web experiences. Those experiences tend to be clean and simple and make use of high end materials in their interfaces like metal, glass or chrome. Trouble is, being elegant or high end can often lead to experiences that feel cold and clinical – doesn’t exactly put you in the right mood to find love. But, many times, very personalized or handcrafted experiences can also be thought of as elegant and high end. For example, think about how receiving a handwritten letter makes you feel versus receiving an email. One’s obviously more personal and more elegant than the other.

So with our final design goal, we set about making this application feel like a very personalized, very simple experience versus a run-of-the-mill-dating search and browse experience. We started by using materials in the interface that would really convey personalization — parchment paper, bamboo, handwritten notes and script fonts. We added a layer of sound effects and animation to help members comprehend key action points. We then simplified and cut down the experience to its most minimal incarnation so that everything was easy to find and easy to use. And of course, we made it all look fantastic! The experience features big, beautiful photos of your matches and one of the most stunning layouts of a user profile in our industry.

So now that you understand the rationale behind our design choices. In our next post, we’ll show you why this version of eHarmony is our best experience yet. Stay tuned to see what we built!

The post Keeping it Real, Warm and Elegant – eHarmony’s Newest Design Challenge appeared first on eHarmony Blog.

We’ve been told by our customers that one really useful thing to know about a match would be their level of activity on the site. Having this information helps our customers prioritize who to communicate with now versus who to communicate with later. You spoke, we listened.

Very shortly, all eHarmony subscribers will notice, when looking at a match (right next to the match’s name actually), a stamp that shows the approximate time frame when that match was last on the site. You will see last login times broken down into the following increments:

• Today
• Yesterday
• Within the last week
• Within the last two weeks
• Over three weeks ago

As you look at your newly delivered matches, you’ll quickly notice that they are in most cases as “active” as you. Hopefully that’ll give you or your match the confidence to take the next step and start communicating. We look forward to hearing your thoughts on this new enhancement, as well as your overall experience on our service.

The post New Feature – “Active Within” Tells You When Your Matches Were Last on the Site appeared first on eHarmony Blog.

Although there is no perfect formula for finding love on any dating site, I do want to share some trends we’ve uncovered for users who get above-average profile activity, more communication and seem to find that special somebody much earlier in the process.

If you want to really increase your chances for success on eHarmony, we recommend doing the following:

1. You need photos.
You might be surprised to learn that nearly 35% of users on eHarmony don’t upload a photo. We know that users who have at least one photo increase their chances of finding someone by almost 100%. (Seriously!)

We’ve found that users who have at least three great photos (what defines a great photo?) almost always meet someone they want to get to know better.

2. Answer Profile Questions, but be yourself.
This seems like a given right? Well, if you’ve been on eHarmony you’ve most likely come across profiles that have very little substance to them. We know for a fact that users who answer at least five profile questions and answer them in a more one-to-one conversational tone see an increase in both received “Smiles” and incoming messages from their matches.

We’re working to revise some of the profile questions to make them more fun to answer and more interesting to read.

3. Don’t be shy about sending a Smile to a match.
Smiles are just a fun way of saying “Hi,” and helping to break the ice with your matches. We’ve found that users who send smiles to their matches tend to end up meeting someone much faster than users who don’t.

4. Consider expanding your match distance settings.
We all hope that our prince or princess is right down the street, but typically you meet matches who are not within your immediate location. This is especially true if you live in more suburban and rural areas.

Try expanding your distance settings (http://www.eharmony.com/singles/servlet/mysettings) and you’ll immediately start receiving new matches. We recommend setting your distance settings to more than 120 miles from you.

You may think, “Who wants to date someone who lives 120 miles away?” but look at it this way. If there is a person who is deeply compatible with you, is ready for a committed relationship, and lives 101 miles away, don’t you want to know it? Isn’t that distance something that you can overcome on your way to a long-term relationship? We’ve seen it happen thousands of times.

So there you have it. The four most important things you can do right now to improve your chances for finding that special someone. We’ll continue to share our findings and help you use eHarmony more effectively.

Be yourself, be honest and have fun! The world can literally be at your fingertips.

The post eHarmony Success in Four Steps appeared first on eHarmony Blog.

Until now, you could only access your Personality Profile when logged into our main site. But now, with the latest version 1.5 release of our iPhone, iPod Touch, iPad and Android mobile apps, you can now read your report while on the go.

The Book of You
When you open the eHarmony mobile app on your iPhone, iPod Touch or Android device, you’ll now find a link to the Personality Profile right on the Home screen. Your report is organized in a book format to make the experience both an interesting and easy read. We encourage you to take a look and see if you don’t learn something valuable about yourself.

Subscribe and Communicate Right from Your Phone
Another new feature in this release is the ability for our US customers to subscribe right from their iPhone, iPod Touch, or Android mobile device. It’s handy to be able to upgrade your account to subscriber status while you’re on the go, especially when you have a match that really wants to get to know you. We support all major credit cards (sorry no Paypal yet), and have a number of plans that can work for most any budget. And if you prefer to talk to one of our customer care agents to complete your subscription, that option is still available.

iPad Bug Fix
Also in this release, we’ve fixed a bug for our iPad app which was forcing our iPad users to log-in again after viewing each match’s photos. Being candid, everyone in QA, Engineering and Product was disappointed that we missed that specific bug. Over the last few releases we’ve been steadily improving the stability and performance of our mobile applications, despite this bug. We want all of our customers to know that our team is focused on continually improving the mobile experience and then when bugs do make it into the wild, we’ll do our best to put out a fix as quickly as we can.
As always, if you have any questions or comments on our new features, please let us know by posting a comment on this blog article. We look forward to hearing from you!

The post eHarmony’s Personality Profile – Now Mobile appeared first on eHarmony Blog.

We applaud Match.com’s decision to join us and start screening members against public sex offender registries. We’ve been doing this for years with eHarmony subscribers who reside in the United States and it has allowed us to keep many known registered sex offenders off of our service. It’s just one way we are committed to looking out for your safety.

While we’re always looking to do more with the latest screening technologies and resources, it’s important to keep in mind that you also play an important role. Unfortunately, registries can be incomplete or inaccurate, assaults and other crimes often go unreported, and perpetrators of crimes are not always convicted. Relying solely on screening can provide a false sense of security.

So what can you do? If you haven’t looked at our Safety Tips page lately, we suggest going back for a refresher. It contains good information about the precautions you should take when meeting someone new in person, such as:
• Keep your guard up and use good judgment when getting to know someone new
• Take it slow and get to know your matches well
• Always go for your first few dates in a public place
• Let a friend or relative know where you are at all times and check in with them if your date is going well and you’re going to be home later than you had planned
• Never invite someone you don’t know well back to your house

If you ever are concerned about one of your matches for any reason, please send an email to matchconcerns@eharmony.com so we can investigate and take appropriate action. We have a team dedicated to our members’ safety and close accounts immediately when we receive a credible complaint about someone’s suspicious behavior. We’ll notify you whenever someone is removed from the service, so please pay attention to those emails if you ever receive one and stop all communication with that person.

We’re always interested in your feedback. Please drop a comment below if you have ideas, comments or suggestions for how we can continue to provide the best possible eHarmony experience.

The post A Safety Reminder from eHarmony appeared first on eHarmony Blog.