Sara Eckel

Posts by Sara Eckel

Sara Eckel is the author of It’s Not You: 27 (Wrong) Reasons You’re Single. You can get a free bonus chapter of her book at saraeckel.com. You can also find her on Twitter at @saraeckel or on Facebook.

After the Breakup: ‘How Did I Miss the Signs?’

I just emerged from a two-month relationship that ended very unkindly. The guy suddenly went missing in action for days, appeared later with some very dodgy-sounding excuses, and then proceeded to break up with me via e-mail, after insinuating that my behavior prompted such a reaction from him. All too often, married and coupled-up friends […]

Singles Are Now the Majority of Americans—and That’s Good for Everyone

The message is delivered in many different formats—wedding invitations, baby announcements, Facebook feeds documenting domestic bliss in excruciating detail. And although no one ever says it aloud, it can make a single person feel out of step, like a lonely outlier in a couples’ world. So here’s some interesting news that won’t come in a […]

What Your Profile Picture Says (and Doesn’t Say) About You

You know the basics. No pictures of exes with heads cut out. No shots of you ten years younger or twenty pounds thinner. And guys, please keep your shirts on. But two recent studies published in the journal Psychological Science shows that the act of choosing the right profile picture isn’t always so intuitive. A […]

Want to Impress Someone? Don’t Try

Many years ago, I was talking to a woman at a party about relationships and mentioned that I hadn’t been in one for ages. She told me this wasn’t a problem for her. She always had a boyfriend—her current beau was a biologist at an elite university—and before him there were plenty of others. “Men […]

Should You Stop Searching for a Soulmate?

Singles are often told to “get out there,” but this advice changes when you actually take it. Then you’re told to relax and let love come naturally. This advice is frequently followed by someone else’s magical “how we met” story. You know the kind. They involve missed flights, traffic snafus, hilarious hijinks (“how did our […]

Do You Have the ‘Facebook Blues?’

Your cousin is picking blueberries with her 3-year-old twins. Your college classmate got married at an 18th century inn. And your ex is chilling at the beach with old friends and wants you to know “it doesn’t get any better than this.” In the age of social media, we know a lot about what our […]

Last week I got a letter from a man named Mark, who asked for advice on giving women compliments. He had met a nice woman at an art galley and they chatted for about half an hour. Mark was normally shy and reserved with women, but a female friend had told him he needed to […]

Getting Over Single ‘Shame’

After being unattached for eleven years, Sue had just started dating someone who had a lot of relationship experience, and she was embarrassed by her thin relationship resume. “How do I let go my feelings of inadequacy?” she asked author Sasha Cagen and I in a recent webcast. Sue had a classic case of single […]

Think You Know How to Flirt? New Research Says You Don’t

You thought you were being so obvious with your jokey comments and playful arm-punches. After all, you don’t brush lint off anyone’s jacket. You don’t gently tease everyone when they take an extra-large helping of mashed potatoes. We flirt with the people we think are cute and might want to date. And yet, so often […]

Are You Hot or Not? The Answer May Change With Time

Lose weight. Whiten your teeth. Work those abs. Cover your gray. And for goodness sake, put on a little lipstick! When you’re dating, the pressure to measure up to the beauty standard prescribed by magazines, advertisements and celebrity info-tainment programs can feel pretty relentless. Sure we all want to look our best, and there is […]

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