Compatible Life Stages

It’s naïve to think that age doesn’t matter. Why? Because none of us are Peter Pan. True, it’s not the number that creates a strain, but where you are in life. For instance, why does the difference between a couple who is 20 and 30 seem greater than the difference between a 50 and 60-year-old couple? The difference of ten years is more significant when you’re striving for major milestones like graduating college, searching for a spouse, buying a house to put roots down or starting a family. Whereas later in life, many of these milestones have already been accomplished.

Physical

One of our Advice members made a good point about the pitfall of insecurity that age differences can fall prey to. What if the older partner can’t keep up physically in appearance, energy level or sex drive? Granted, insecurity can be the enemy of any relationship regardless of age, but it’s easier to accept changes that come with age when you can relate with your partner rather than just observe.

The Novelty Wears Off

The humor of hearing things like, “Fleetwood Mac, who’s that?” or “I bought my first car brand new for $3,500”, grows old (no pun intended) after a while. While being compatible on core elements of your personality are most important, it’s also nice to have a partner who you can relate with on a conversational level.

I’m sure there are plenty of 20-year-olds with marriage at the top of their priority list who are balking at this topic, but in general, it boils down to this – where are you in your life and what are your priorities?

I would love to know if you have dated someone significantly older or younger – and how did it work out? What challenges did you face?

The post Age Doesn’t Matter…Or Does It? appeared first on eHarmony Blog.

Who enjoys a joke more between men and women? If you guessed “both” then you are correct! On a scale from 1 to 7, the average score for both men and women came in at the same, 6.3.

So, in which state can you find the most joke-tellers? Actually, to be specific, it’s not a state at all but a district. That’s right! All those politics must have people in stitches because Washington DC ranked the highest above all the states at an average of 6.4. Here’s a rundown of the top 10:

1. Washington DC
2. New Jersey
3. Maryland
4. Illinois
5. Colorado
6. Florida
7. Georgia
8. South Carolina
9. Arizona
10. Arkansas

Bringing up the rear is our dear friend, New Hampshire in last place. C’mon, New Hampshirites! For a state that names the pumpkin as their state fruit, you’ve GOT to have a sense of humor!

Like a breath of fresh air, our younger members take the prize for the best to jest at age 24, ranking at an average of 6.5. After 24 the score steadily shrinks by about 1-2% each year. One of the most significant dips happens between the ages of 53 and 54 which is probably about the age of parents of, say, a joke-cracking 24-year-old? By the age of 70 the average tumbles into the 5 range on our 1 to 7 scale. Not to worry though, the trend peaks again when our members hit their 90’s. (Yep, that’s right, there are eHarmony members in their 90’s and even 100’s!) Long story short, take a page from our 24 and 90-year olds! Life is meant to be enjoyed.

Sample taken from 577,591 eHarmony members who completed the Relationship Questionnaire.

The post The Biggest Jokers: From Washington DC! appeared first on eHarmony Blog.

Come prepared with interesting questions.
Let’s be honest. Sitting through a series of eight-minute interviews isn’t fun for anyone. After two or three  “dates” that started with the boring, live/work/hobby questions, I found myself wondering if I should have just brought copies of my resume to hand out. Mix it up, come equipped with something quirky. “What’s your most recent embarrassing experience?” This lets them see your sense of humor and allows them to showcase theirs as well.

Bring a married friend…wait, what?!
Not to participate, of course, but to give you a birds-eye view of the action. You’ll have so much going on in front of you that it’s easy to miss that cute guy or girl across the room who keeps glancing your direction. Your friend, however, will have a play-by-play account of everything happening on and off the field. My off-the-market friend ended up having a blast too, and what better way to end the event than a recap with your bff?

Level your expectations.
This is a tip that came directly from our members, and I couldn’t agree more. Take speed dating for what it is – a lighthearted evening where you can acquaint yourself with several singles who are available and looking. Keep in mind, the speed dating scene tends to attract singles of a more casual caliber in their dating mindset. So if you’re looking for a serious relationship, speed dating may not be the best approach to find that…but it’s still a fun way to spend a Friday night.

In speed dating, you may find one or two singles who turn into a real date. It does take a bit of digging to find those few, and unlike a matching site like eHarmony, the legwork is yours to do. The handful of dates that I went out on fizzled pretty quickly when I discovered dealbreakers that could have been sussed out pretty easily had I spent more than 8 minutes getting to know these gents. But sometimes recognizing what you don’t want in a partner is just as important as recognizing what you do want. It’s a good opportunity to sharpen your dating senses so that when the right one does come your way, you can truly appreciate who they are and why they’re right for you.

Have you tried speed dating? Would you recommend it?

The post Speed Dating: Efficient, but is it Effective? appeared first on eHarmony Blog.