It’s so easy to focus on what is missing in our lives – but most of us have so much more than many others in this world. Had to share this blog from dating coach Lisa Darsonval, who reminds us how important and life-changing gratitude can be.
To be successful at dating or anything for that matter, you need to have a sense of gratitude. Gratitude is the quality of being thankful, a readiness to show appreciation for — and to return — kindness. Why does this matter when it comes to dating? According to Psychology Today, “Studies show that counting our blessings improves psychological, emotional and physical well-being.”
Robert Emmons, editor-in-chief of the Journal of Positive Psychology, discusses in his book the profound impact a practice of gratitude can have on your heart and those in your lives. Emmons makes the astonishing claim that people who practice gratitude are an amazing 25 percent happier than those who do not. Imagine the impact this can have on your love life!
Adopting an attitude of gratitude for your life, surroundings and experiences will help you grow into a happier, kinder human being. Those around you will be drawn to your positive energy and feel your appreciation towards them. They will know you are an emotionally healthy person and can relax and allow you to enter their lives.
You may be thinking, “What do I have to be grateful for?” Try this exercise to get you in the moment and paying attention to the many things you have in your life to be thankful for. Starting from the moment you awake in the morning …
1. You’re alive. Shut out all thoughts of things you need to do and just be grateful you are breathing and living.
2. Your body. You are touching, tasting, talking, hearing, feeling, breathing and seeing. If you use some type of aid to help you do these things, appreciate that they are available to you.
3. Electricity. Was that a light you just switched on so you could see? Did your coffee maker start brewing your favorite blend? Pure magic.
4. Running water. Is there running water coming out of your faucet with the twist of your wrist? How’s that for instant gratification? Let’s not forget that warm shower, hot bath, flushing toilet, cold ice in your freezer and more.
5. Food. It’s right there being kept fresh in your refrigerator just waiting to nourish your body. Savor the smells, textures and flavors as you eat to truly enjoy what’s feeding your body and soul.
6. Friends. Not only are they there to share your ups and downs, you have complete freedom to choose who those special people are. Be a friend in return and you will never find yourself alone.
7. Freedom. No matter what your life may bring you, you are free to choose your own path, to speak your mind and to practice your religion. You could decide today to change careers and have numerous opportunities available to you. Believe in yourself and follow your dreams; you have 100 percent freedom to do so.
8. Nature. To truly live with inner harmony, you must connect with nature. Go take that walk in the park and “smell the roses.” See and hear the birds, take a swim in a stream. Feel this intimate connection with earth and say thank you.
9. Beauty. We are surrounded by beauty, whether it be in a painting, a photograph or a song. We can find beauty in the faces around us and from deep within each person.
10. Love. To profoundly love, you must sincerely respect and appreciate who you are. When you can accept yourself, so can those around you. You are a loving being and you deserve to be loved in return. Love comes in many forms: kids, family, pets, coworkers … pay attention to all of the sources of love in your life and you’ll develop a growing sense of abundance around how much love surrounds you each and every day.
By following my suggestions you will begin to truly see the beauty and wonder around you. If you’re married, appreciating the one you love more will deepen your commitment and help to foster a great sense of wholeness and fulfillment. And if you’re single, don’t be surprised when dating becomes more enjoyable and soon that special someone will be very grateful to have you in his or her life.
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