Comments on: Sick and Tired of Waiting for Love?

By: michelle

michelle — Sat, 07 Jul 2012 22:48:18 +0000

I try to treat people like i would want to be treated and im not ugly or extremely overweight (little chunky but nothing not manageable). It seems I see ugly girls have bf and my own aunt who is extemely verbally abusive and demanding has had two guys both the same –yes honey -whatever u want honey -when she yells he says how high-dont understand

By: Dave

Dave — Sat, 07 Jul 2012 16:17:37 +0000

Waiting for the love is not an everyday work, you shouldn’t think about it constantly! There won’t be any result besides stress. You should just mind your own business and love will find you. Good luck!

By: John

John — Wed, 04 Jul 2012 07:18:33 +0000

Man, I wish I was a women, dating would be so much easier. That is the problem, just sitting there doing nothing being pateint, all that is going to do is just make you end up with Mr. Guy You Know. They say it is the right thing to do to learn to be okay with being alone, but we are not all Buddist Monks or Catholic Preist or even care to be either of the two. I think it is about time we say that it is not okay to be alone, and that learning to be happy with someone else would always be better than being happy alone, at least then you would have someone else to talk too. Then what if you turn out to be happy alone, does that automatically teach you how to be happy with someone else?

By: Shelley

Shelley — Fri, 29 Jun 2012 21:23:40 +0000

I have been married twice and been in a few long term relationships as well. Perhaps the perpetually single people have been afraid to do the one thing that usually advances a relationship: share a personal part of themselves, their past, their private thoughts; it feels like a risky thing to do but it opens up the other person to trust you and to share themselves with you as well. If you present as a closed-off wall, nobody will even attempt to penetrate that solid, daunting fortress and will move on to a warmer, more welcoming kingdom.

By: Patricia

Patricia — Fri, 29 Jun 2012 02:33:38 +0000

After reading all the advice and seemingly hopelessness of meeting a soul-mate in later years (I’m 61 and have never been married), it all seems very discouraging indeed, as JbC pointed out. I have not been in a committed relationship in over 10 years and there have been times when I have just plain given up. I’ve heard it all from friends: “you’ll meet someone when you’re not expecting it”, or “maybe you need to change your hair”, or some absurd suggestion like that. I have gone through periods where I focused on other things in my life, as I am now, and I have gone through periods where I ached to be held and have someone to share my life with. No matter what, the “right” one hasn’t materialized. I’ve met some very selfish men online who only wanted a one-night stand and nothing more. I am physically active and work out and the “Y” regularly. I am attractive and love to engage in conversation (part of my job, too). I have traveled the world on my own and meet lots of people at my job. Are some people destined to be single for the rest of their lives, never to experience the joys and challenges of love? Tell me this isn’t so.

By: Dixie

Dixie — Thu, 28 Jun 2012 20:24:57 +0000

Ted,
Just relax and take life one day at the time. I truly believe the right one for us comes along when we are least expecting it. So, don’t blow this chance when she does come along…. keeping yourself alert , aware, and available.

By: Carl S.

Carl S. — Thu, 28 Jun 2012 05:58:28 +0000

I’m 55 and so have been doing my waiting for love for about 35-40 years. I had the misfortune to come of age in the ’70s. Just when I was ready to begin dating, I was surprised to learn from the media how much of a worthless jerk I was for being male. The devaluation of men has been a constant theme since then. The same media has since that time admonished women to accept nothing less in a man than her idealized picture of the Perfect Man. Because she’s worth it- presumably by being female. Pretty tough to compete with that. I own and have read boxes full of advice books on relationships and dating advice for men. A few have been genuinely insightful; most are next to worthless. All, however, do discuss, or at least mention, the absolute necessity of having self-confidence, and I can understand that. How to get it is another matter. My experiences have been similar to Ted’s and Country Guy’s. After two or three dates during which things seem to be going well and mutual interest seems to be there, the woman then disappears. No response to phone calls or e-mails…nothing. By this point, it’s pretty hard to remain patient and confident that I’ll find love when all the empirical evidence is screaming otherwise at me. In all these years, I’ve yet to have a woman tell me what happened or why she no longer wants to continue seeing me. I have been told lies/given meaningless excuses occasionally, but nothing that makes any sense. The honesty that 90% of women say in their profiles that they want in a man obviously does not include repoprocity. Female friends who know me well tell me that I’m a catch, but I wonder if they’re lying, too- but if so, then why bother to make that up? I doubt that I will ever understand what’s going on, and I’m really out of ideas. I tried eharmony hoping that there was some truth in their advertising and they really do try to match like-minded people, but thus far I’ve had no better luck with their matches than I’ve had with chance meetings of women. Finally, yes, I know….therapy would be a great idea. That’s why I’ve been going regularly for the past 20 years.

By: JbC

JbC — Thu, 28 Jun 2012 05:08:33 +0000

There doesn’t seem to be a lot of positive responses to this particular blog. There seems to be an appalling number of people enduring years, if not decades of repeated, abject failure to escape loneliness. In such conditions, to be able to project the confidence and positiveness necessary to attract anyone at all is a cruel joke. Is there any hope?

By: JbC

JbC — Thu, 28 Jun 2012 04:02:17 +0000

I’m afraid ….you are ….. correct.

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Thu, 28 Jun 2012 01:37:46 +0000

It’s basically just like the old saying about watching water boil. The more you focus all your attention on something, the time feels longer. I believe patience is very necessary. It will make one more relaxed and show to any potential partner the good side of oneself. Instead of the over anxious, my clock is ticking side.