I finally realized that going a week without contact is a non-verbal message saying ‘Im not thinking of you for even one second in the past 604800 seconds?’ or ‘I have thought of you but you are so insignificant to me that I can’t be bothered to reach out.’ It hurts.

No amount of excuses can explain why you didn’t contact me, (or respond) in an entire week. Even if you work two jobs, coach a little league game and volunteer double shift, it doesn’t excuse the fact that you’re not multitasking all day long and there are 24 hours in a day and if you can’t dial my number while you are taking a dump and say hey just wanted to let you know I haven’t forgotten about you, but we’ll catch up.” then you are LYING THROUGH YOUR TEETH. Because I have a life too and I will always find a moment to contact you. That said, I realized I was getting screwed and moved on.

Someone said why not call him? Usually when someone goes cold turkey, the ‘abandoned’ one has realized that the relationship is already at a rocky status (with u having a gut feeling that somethings changing) and the problem is the last thing you hear from him is ‘I’ll call u back’.

Or he is the one who tweaked ‘the pattern’ of the relationship. ex. He calls u at night and you call him every morning (its just ur thing), then he stops the pattern of it and gives no reasons for doing so, so it makes it hard to reach out to that person bc u fear rejection bc if he wanted to call he would have done so. It’s not in our heads, he definitely has already distanced himself and the balls in his court.

Back to the point, Whenever he goes a day with ‘minimum contact’, I call him on it. He used to call me several times a day, even after we moved in together and sneak a break at work to hear my voice. Then it kind of gradually mellowed out. He stopped calling me when he arrived at work and would call me the last 3 mins of his lunch break. He claims he didn’t get a lunch or he was doing something. I didn’t make a big deal out of the no-morning calls or break calls because the relationship isn’t new anymore and it’s ok but once he called me for 30 seconds and said I’ll call u right back. The next time I heard his voice, he was coming in the door. You lie about calling me back and then from that point until the time you get home, I don’t cross your mind?
This is how I take it: You are either spending time with (talking with) someone else or you are thinking of someone else.

I had bad gut feelings so I called him on it. Told him lately you’ve been forgetting about me. What’s new at work? What’s changed where you no longer want to call me in your free time? He said he was busy and so I asked for details. He couldn’t come up with anything except he had a short lunch break and couldn’t remember why he didn’t call me after work. I didn’t buy his bs so I just asked ‘are you spending your time with another woman? Is there someone else you prefer talking to?’ in a very calm voice. He looked at me like he couldn’t believe I would think that. But I stood my ground. He denied it really weakly so I couldn’t judge if he was being honest, so I just told him ‘if you are I hope she’s worth it because you already know where I stand on that issue’.

I love him but I will not stand for it. IMO, women who accept that kind of behavior end up getting mistreated, abused and taken for granted and same goes for men too.

The next week he was back to normal but I’m no dummy, he might just be playing the good boy and falling in love with some other woman. So, If he does it again, I’ll just have to randomly pop up on his job one day… or maybe just give him a dose of his own medicine.

And now for the past 4 weeks I’ve seen her 3 times.. And spoke four days a week.. About 3-4 mins a day..

What’s up with that???..

I’ve been over the top nice..
I ve taken her to so many places she’s never been..
Flowers candy, and tons of respect and kindness….
She’s from a small town.. I’m a city kind of guy…

I’m a tall and fit guy 50 years old.. So I don’t think it’s looks???

She tells me that she’s just scared and stressed out from work… and just needs time to think!!.

Am I a fool to keep trying??