Within the first 2-1/2 months, I received over 200 potential matches and while I rejected quite a few of them out of hand (and was rejected out of hand by quite a few of them, too) but I hung in there…and on July 14th — WHAM! Up came a match with a man who lived just 40 miles from here and who had so much in common with me, I had to keep pinching myself to make sure I wasn’t dreaming! We met in person 6 weeks later and have been inseparable ever since. We are ENGAGED, by the way, but at our ages (I just turned 58 and he will be 60 in a few months) there is no big rush to get married.

I find myself ALWAYS touting the benefits of reading “Date or Soul Mate” BEFORE joining eHarmony and the principles apply whether you decide to try online dating or not. When I finished reading that book for the second time, I knew exactly what I NEEDED and WANTED in a new relationship. There is a HUGE DIFFERENCE between needs and wants and not knowing what they are can mean the difference between Boom! and Bust!
kathi

Additionally, in my opinion, there should never be more than 1 week of free subscribing to anyone, because it eliminates more of the non-serious contenders.

I would agree with Elizabeth that there are many uneducated people on the site as well.

There’s no telling who is actually ACTIVE or even a real MEMBER. Most other dating sites include data on how recently the member has logged on…

Many of the matches with which we communicate may not have been on the site for months! It would be nice to know who of our matches are mutually invested in this process.

Lizzie

Sadly, I’m not getting matched with any of them apparently.

Lizzie

I had met my soul mate last year through EH- we had an amazing connection both online & in-person (over several months). One week we were planning our lives & futures together, then the next, he abruptly decided he had to be single- permanently.

I’ve given EH a try since then, but either the matches wouldn’t respond or they were:
1) much older than I
2) uneducated
(despite my graduate education)
or
3) completely illiterate &
4) didn’t seem to be EH “material”
(this was primarily during the FCE)

Also, I couldn’t tell who was an active member from those who had filled out a profile during the FCE. I put a lot of time, effort & poured myself into my communication, but was not getting a “return” on my investment.

So, I cancelled my membership. Sadly.

I still believe in the EH matching system, but feel that the more recent members are less “invested” in the process & want to short-cut guided communication or just participate in FCE’s.

Disappointed, but still Hopeful,

“Lizzie”

I do see where you’re coming from with this. I hope you can understand that our only goal, in fact the only goal that keeps us in business, is making people happy with matches.

So, every decision we make is in an attempt to keep the overall ecosystem of matching healthy and working for the majority of people. We’re big believers in letting new people try eHarmony before they buy. That’s why we give them matches. If they like the match, they subscribe. Every single person who gets a match can respond. Some need to subscribe to respond, but when they see a match that is of interest to them. They do.

Of course, not knowing you or seeing your profile it is hard for me to understand getting such little activity on eHarmony. If I were to look at your account, it might become clear to me in a second. Again, if I were you, and I knew people who had success on eHarmony and I was having no luck, I would be in touch with Customer Care to say, “Please help me get this back on track.” They would love to help you.