The worst:
She requests to go straight to email, then first email is asking my phone #. Warning sign right there, but I thought what the heck so I give it. She calls me about an hour later, and after about literally 2 minutes of small talk she asks that I come meet her. She’s doing a pool tournament and wants me to come by, I say sure, and when I try for more conversation she says she has to go. So I meet her at the pool tournament, she introduces me over to a group of friends then walks away to practice pool. I wait patiently while I watch her play pool (she comes over and says maybe 2 sentences to me the whole night). After about 2 hours of this the pool tournament is over, she starts walking out with her friends. I awkwardly follow (not sure what else to do) and she turns towards me, waves, and says, “nice meeting you!”. Never heard from her again.

Next one:
First two dates are great. One warning sign comes up, she tells me she has a daughter but let her parents raise her, and the whole family tells the daughter that she is her “sister”. Being a psychology major with a child development focus, I am thinking that is so wrong on so many levels, but I don’t say anything. Third date she decides she wants me to meet her friends. We all go downtown, 3 couples. Her friends are complete opposites of me, I’m a city boy and her friends are total country. I have very little conversation with them, and even less with her. The next day she breaks up with me over email, stating “I remind her too much of her father.” ???

Last one:
Total alcoholic, but we have a lot in common besides that. First date goes great. 2nd date is downtown and she is 45 min late, no apology, but the date does go well. 3rd date she cancels because she says she’s sick (probably hung over) and we do it the following weekend. Next date she cancels again (this time admitting to being hung over). During conversation we talked about relationships, she tells me she has had no serious relationships in her life (she’s 38, decent looking). Warning bells scream at me, but I like her so I ignore it. Finally after a very awkward next date at her house watching TV she cancels our plans for the following day over text. Wasnt too upset other than I attended alone (with 2 tickets).

Moral of the story, listen to those warning bells people!

The 2nd was another dating site catastrophe. After speaking over the phone and exchanging pics, the person I met turned out to be a woman half way thru a sex change. No, the photos she sent were not of her.

Oh wait, there’s a 3rd – I meet up with a handsome landscaper I had met in the neighborhood. After ordering a drink before dinner, he tells me he already ate earlier because he was hungry and should we just go for a drive and ‘have some fun’? Erm, no.

Just think about how GREAT it will be when you meet someone who is NORMAL! These dates seem so horrible at the time, yet if we can laugh about them, perhaps we can move on to have hope for better dates.

It’s darned hard to find a nice tall man. And that you are. Some gal is out there waiting for you. And she will be sober, oin time and won’t fall asleep on you at dinner. WOW.

I had a 6 hour drive to the airport, then a 2 hour flight. The day before, I had been bucked off of a horse and stomped on. I did not want to “whine”, so I went to my rheumatologist and got a steroid-cocktail joint injection in my neck on my way to the airport. But the doc hit a vein and the injection went wrong, VERY wrong.

By the time I got off the plane, I had a hematoma the size of a bunch of bananas on my arm, filled with blood and my body reacted to the steroids. I could actually feel my legs SWELLING on the plane as we gained altitude. My pants felt tight when I deboarded. I felt like a stuffed Brautwurst.

He was waiting downstairs at the airport to greet me. I used the restroom to try and regroup. I grabbed some hair spray (I have really long hair and it normally gets compliments) and I sprayed away to spruce up with a conditioner product.

I had grabbed this moroccon oil spray I use which is awesome, makes your hair really shiny. But the minute after I used it, my head started to tingle, my scalp started burning.

I had grabbed the bottle on the way out of my ranch. My uncle had been staying with me, he had just gotten hair transplants and he put his hair transplant medicine in one of my empty spray bottles because he was hiding the fact from all the “guys” on the ranch that he got transplants. He had tossed his med bottle to hide the evidence. That stuff is TOXIC for normal hair, it is only to be used with that medical procedure.

My hair immediately started falling out after I sprayed it and it turned an UGLY orangish/dirty greasy like state. (I have dark hair)

I was still determined to soldier on! I threw my hair in a bun. I put on a brave face. The phone rings and it is him downstairs saying he has been waiting for 30 minutes. Fighter Pilots are punctual; I knew I was in trouble.

On the way down to greet him I got a call, it looked like I would be working at the same military base as he was stationed and my contract forbids me to date anyone I work with, ever. My heart sank. Yet HIS heart sank even more when he greeted me. He looked utterly disgusted by me:-)

I gracefully met him. He stared at my hair allot and looked shocked. I made it one night. I was in so much pain in my arm and neck and my scalp was burning.

It went from bad to worse. I kept my arm covered, I tried a light hike with him, etc. fully clothed with long sleeves on a hot day. All my clothes were tight, I was swollen. ugh. Finally after less than 24 hours I asked for a ride to the airport.

He is a Colonel now and I am slated to start a project at his base this summer. To say I looked like death warmed over, is an understatement. At one point, he even asked me “if I wanted to wash my hair”. It was a disaster. He has no idea of anything I’ve told you. On his side, he just said he was “not feeling it for me” and he was greatly dissappointed.

Honestly, I was thinking that my arm needed to be amputated and I am not a whimp. I had a serious issue going on; besides the scalp ordeal.

I think I am just going to shake his hand when I walk into his office this summer and pretend that date never happened. He may not even recognize me?

Worst Date ever.

Our phone conversations up to this point were scintillating and I could not reconcile the experience.

Although I am not dating anymore I can’t stop wondering about what these people are thinking when they decide to meet dates. I have had many terrible dates with men I met through e-Harmony and Match.com. These two services attract customers who lack basic social skills. Number one is the doctor who makes tons of money and drives fancy cars but takes me for shopping to the Dollar Store with the explanation “this is my favorite store and you are a cheap date”. This was our second date actually. There were a couple of more disasters dates. I knew we were going nowhere but was curious to see what else the jerk would come up with. Like we went for a walk in the park and he accidentally stepped on a dog’s poo. We smelt it when we got back in the car, and his comment was, ‘oh, it could not be me, it is you’. You should have seen his face when he realized that it was on his shoe. Or we went for dinner to a small neighborhood restaurant and he concentrated on finding negative things about the place, the service and the food. The restaurant was his idea but he kept whining the whole time we were there. Once we went to a casino, and the jerk lost. Then he disappeared without an explanation – stopped calling and replying to my messages. Two months later he had the nerve to email me back: ‘hopefully you are not too mad’. I never replied.

There must be something wrong with MDs because I had a date with another unbelievably cheap one. We met for a coffee, and then decided that we were both hungry and went to a nearby place for food. He let me pay for my own coffee that cost a dollar and half, and I had to pay for the food for both of us because it was my idea and he was ‘on budget’. There was never a second date.

A friend of mine also met an MD (Match.com) and they realized that they were going to the same gym. The first date was at the gym. They worked out together and decided to eat something after. The doctor had conveniently left his wallet in his sports! car and my friend who was a student at the that time had to pay for the food.