Comments on: Hypothetical – What Questions Would You Add to eHarmony’s Profile, “In Your Own Words”? http://www.eharmony.com/blog/2011/03/21/hypothetical-%e2%80%93-what-questions-would-you-add-to-eharmony%e2%80%99s-profile-%e2%80%9cin-your-own-words%e2%80%9d/ eHarmony experts’ take on dating, relationships and the science of love Mon, 11 Mar 2013 14:53:23 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.5.1 By: Carrie http://www.eharmony.com/blog/2011/03/21/hypothetical-%e2%80%93-what-questions-would-you-add-to-eharmony%e2%80%99s-profile-%e2%80%9cin-your-own-words%e2%80%9d/#comment-1587 Carrie Sun, 10 Apr 2011 17:03:39 +0000 http://advice.eharmony.com/blog/?p=7590#comment-1587 In your profile wizard, “Something to talk about” section I think it would be more beneficial to have a check box system in the areas like favorite music. We could then check all that apply and at the end leave a space that says “List some favorite artists”. You could do this with the books, movies, sports, TV, etc sections. I realize that there are a couple which are already efficient, like politics, but the more information of this type you can gather up front would open up more match potentials. (ie: I like Mystery novels, romance, sci-fi, contempory fiction and sometimes self-help. So I check all of those and then answer an open-ended question with “I have recently read Christine Feehan and Stephen King’s “The Two Towers, I & II, and “Demons and Angels”). I hope this makes sense. Also, don’t worry about the contest, I realize this is past the deadline. Thank-you for your consideration of my suggestion.

]]> By: Grant Langston, Senior Director, Content http://www.eharmony.com/blog/2011/03/21/hypothetical-%e2%80%93-what-questions-would-you-add-to-eharmony%e2%80%99s-profile-%e2%80%9cin-your-own-words%e2%80%9d/#comment-1506 Grant Langston, Senior Director, Content Wed, 06 Apr 2011 17:21:50 +0000 http://advice.eharmony.com/blog/?p=7590#comment-1506 Ok, It looks like the comments have dropped off on this post and so, as promised, I’m going to award one of the three participants a free month of eHarmony.

Drum role please…..

the winner is Jessica, our first commenter. I’ll notify Jessica by email.

]]> By: Jane http://www.eharmony.com/blog/2011/03/21/hypothetical-%e2%80%93-what-questions-would-you-add-to-eharmony%e2%80%99s-profile-%e2%80%9cin-your-own-words%e2%80%9d/#comment-1456 Jane Thu, 31 Mar 2011 15:45:00 +0000 http://advice.eharmony.com/blog/?p=7590#comment-1456 Oh and a biggie, I forgot to list.

If you have an ex-spouse, are they remarried? or are they still in love with you and will make our lives together as miserable as possible?

LOL, probably not a question eHarmony can tenderly ask, BUT, let me tell you how important the answer to that one is!

]]> By: Jane http://www.eharmony.com/blog/2011/03/21/hypothetical-%e2%80%93-what-questions-would-you-add-to-eharmony%e2%80%99s-profile-%e2%80%9cin-your-own-words%e2%80%9d/#comment-1455 Jane Thu, 31 Mar 2011 15:40:07 +0000 http://advice.eharmony.com/blog/?p=7590#comment-1455 A question I would LOVE to know the answer to “up front” but don’t know if there is really a good way to verbalize it, except the option of , check all that apply!

If Hind Sight is 20/20, what would you have done differently in your past relationships?

a) Been more ready to look at myself and the possibility I might have made a mistake that caused a conflict.
b) Focused more and given more of my time to my partner for “just us” time.
c) Verbalized “I love you” more often.
d) Been more assertive in communication of negative feelings as opposed to bottling them up.
e) Made more effort to initiate physical intimacy with my partner.
f) Tried harder to show my partner they were a top priority by not working so much overtime or taking that extra assignment.
e) Been more willing to participate in partner’s choice of activities as opposed to only showing enthusiasm in activities of your choice.

Another way to find out if your match has learned from their past mistakes is just to ask and then provide space for an answer

“If you had it to do over again, what would you have done differently that you NOW realize caused problems in your past relationships”?

These are things that show if a person has truly learned from the past, or if they are doomed to continue the pattern they developed in past failed relationships.

]]> By: eck http://www.eharmony.com/blog/2011/03/21/hypothetical-%e2%80%93-what-questions-would-you-add-to-eharmony%e2%80%99s-profile-%e2%80%9cin-your-own-words%e2%80%9d/#comment-1416 eck Thu, 24 Mar 2011 18:59:26 +0000 http://advice.eharmony.com/blog/?p=7590#comment-1416 Q1. “If you were granted 3 wishes, what would they be?”

I’d ask this because
1. people love to talk about what they like
2. it can be casually answered (for those with short attention spans) or answered with depth
3. it’s an energy question, people should get energized trying to answer it. when that happened, it allows people to be seen in their best mood/light (which makes them an easier sell)
4. it can be revealing (of a person’s values and goals) and will be different for each person

or that’s my guess anyway, only way to know for sure though is to test it for real!

Q2.
The other question, that I think is needed and can be filled out via checkboxes (i.e. multiple checkboxes filled is ok…like our options for religion or race preferences) …”What are you looking for/hope/intend to get out of this?”
[_] marriage
[_] long term relationship
[_] casual dating
[_] friendship / activity partner
[_] etc, etc
[_] I don’t know..

eHarmony can then match us to the people who have the same objectives as us. it’s going to come up eventually anyway, but would be best to clear it upfront to save time and avoid any misunderstandings down the road.

]]> By: eck http://www.eharmony.com/blog/2011/03/21/hypothetical-%e2%80%93-what-questions-would-you-add-to-eharmony%e2%80%99s-profile-%e2%80%9cin-your-own-words%e2%80%9d/#comment-1415 eck Thu, 24 Mar 2011 18:58:26 +0000 http://advice.eharmony.com/blog/?p=7590#comment-1415 I’d ask this because
1. people love to talk about what they like
2. it can be casually answered (for those with short attention spans) or answered with depth
3. it’s an energy question, people should get energized trying to answer it. when that happened, it allows people to be seen in their best mood/light (which makes them an easier sell)
4. it can be revealing (of a person’s values and goals) and will be different for each person

or that’s my guess anyway, only way to know for sure though is to test it for real!

Q2.
The other question, that I think is needed and can be filled out via checkboxes (i.e. multiple checkboxes filled is ok…like our options for religion or race preferences) …”What are you looking for/hope/intend to get out of this?”
[_] marriage
[_] long term relationship
[_] casual dating
[_] friendship / activity partner
[_] etc, etc
[_] I don’t know..

eHarmony can then match us to the people who have the same objectives as us. it’s going to come up eventually anyway, but would be best to clear it upfront to save time and avoid any misunderstandings down the road.

]]> By: Jessica http://www.eharmony.com/blog/2011/03/21/hypothetical-%e2%80%93-what-questions-would-you-add-to-eharmony%e2%80%99s-profile-%e2%80%9cin-your-own-words%e2%80%9d/#comment-1398 Jessica Tue, 22 Mar 2011 18:20:58 +0000 http://advice.eharmony.com/blog/?p=7590#comment-1398 1. What age range are you children in?
0-5
6-10
11-15
16+

2. Do your children live with you on a full time basis?

3. What type of gifts would you give to that special someone in your life?
1. Expensive–jewelry
2. Creative –like writing them a song
3. Romantic — weekend getaway
4. Home made — dinner, cake, household project needing to be done
5. Or not at all — don’t believe in gifts

4. What kind of relationship to you have with your ex-spouse?
1. None at all-only communicate via email/text messages
2. Very good — friends
3. Civil — but can get heated at times
4. Widow/widower

These few questions going forward would be a help.

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